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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30018372">And I Swear By The Sword</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdyourbreathfornow/pseuds/holdyourbreathfornow'>holdyourbreathfornow</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Half-Life VR but the AI is Self-Aware - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, And Lots of It, Architectural world building, Banter, Body Horror, Fight Scenes, First Kisses, Formal English, Getting Together, Gods AU, M/M, Medieval Fantasy AU, Medieval Medicine, Minor Character Death, More tags to be added, Necromancy, Poisoning, Possession, Quests, Religious Debates, Undead horror, Violence, allusions to drinking, even MORE WORLD BUILDING HAHAHAH, injuries, medieval knights, minor characters - Freeform, world building</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 10:20:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>27,322</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30018372</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdyourbreathfornow/pseuds/holdyourbreathfornow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Gordon Freeman is a loyal knight of Black Mesa, and content to put his days of questing behind him.</p><p>However, when the sky itself seems to rebel against the natural order, Gordon finds his past does not want to leave him just yet.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Benrey/Gordon Freeman</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>118</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>98</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I've been working on this for... Awhile, tbh.  I'm proud of how it's turned out and I hope you enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>The duty of guarding the outer gates of Black Mesa is considered a punishment by the knights within the kingdom.  But to Gordon it seems more like a reprieve.  Atop the walls that surround Black Mesa, he’s far enough away from the hustle and bustle that the very sounds of people’s voices won’t feel as if they’ll drive him mad.  The torchlight flickers across his face as Gordon stares up at the stars, his sword laid across his lap.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Why do you stare up at the sky every night you are here?”  A younger soldier, barely a boy in comparison, asks Gordon.  The older man smiles and looks at the boy.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“They say that those who know how to read the stars will one day ascend to be among them, while those who cannot will remain on Earth, their souls becoming energy for the forests and fields.  I’m trying to learn to read the stars.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Have you no love for the forests and fields, then?”  The soldier asks and Gordon laughs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“It may befit another to become an old elm tree, but if I were to go up there, I could see every leaf on every bush in the world.  A bigger picture seems more my speed.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Not me.”  The soldier smirks and jabs a thumb at himself.  “I’m going to become a snake and bite the ankles of my enemies once I’m gone.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What use have you for enemies at your age?”  The soldier rolls his eyes at that, but his smirk doesn’t vanish.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“At least your only enemy is old age.”  Gordon snorts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You don’t show your elder the dignity he deserves.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The only elder around here is the castle wall.”  Another knight, patrolling the wall, stops in front of Gordon and his companion.  “You are both little piglets compared to one like me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You must be a hog, then.  You certainly grunt enough, Jefferem.”  Gordon roars with laughter at that and the younger knight grins, proud of the reaction he’s gotten.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Mark my words, Josh, I will feed you to my sow wife.”  Jefferem wags a finger at Josh threateningly before continuing along his route, vanishing into the shadows that climb the walls, only held at bay by torch light like the one Gordon and Josh sit around.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Your name is Josh, then?”  Gordon asks, and Josh nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Aye.  I’ve only just advanced from being a squire, but at least the noble boys cannot use me as a whipping boy anymore.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I remember those days well.”  Gordon nods in sympathy.  “My name is Gordon.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I know.”  Josh smiles again.  “There are stories about you and your adventures outside of Black Mesa.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“‘Stories’.  More like idle gossip.”  Gordon rolls his eyes.  After a moment of silence, he raises an eyebrow at Josh.  “But since the night is still and tiresome, why don’t you regale this old, frail elder with tales of his wild youth?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Your memory is going?”  Josh asks and Gordon nods in fake solemnity.  “Very well, then.  I heard you scaled the Mountain of the Boulder Spirits, where you…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>As Josh continues to talk, Gordon once again turns his gaze to the sky above him.  He draws invisible lines between the stars with his eyes, assigning them names that he would never be able to repeat or pronounce out loud, pure gibberish for his own entertainment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>He stops being entertained when one star blinks out of sight and simply doesn’t come back.  He convinces himself his eyes are tricking him,  However, when an entire cluster of stars vanish in an instant, Gordon reaches over the torch and nudges Josh, halting his stories.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You look like you’ve seen a spirit.”  Josh tries to joke, but Gordon silently points up at the sky, where more and more stars continue to disappear.  Josh cries out wordlessly in fear and awe.  The sound of running steps hurries towards them and Jefferem re-emerges from the dark, hurrying to make sure he’s standing in the light of the torch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What’s causing this?”  He asks but neither Gordon nor Josh have an answer for him.  The three men watch until every star in the sky has gone, until the only thing left in the dark is the torch they stand around.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The darkness seems to convulse and twist, shuddering like someone has stabbed the sky itself.   All of a sudden, the darkness becomes a thick black mist, coiling tighter and tighter until it’s a cloudy orb.  It rockets beyond the horizon and in its wake, the stars have all reappeared, like they were never hidden in the first place.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“...Has the water been drugged?”  Gordon asks finally, trying to break the silence, but his voice and hands are trembling.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I’m going to report this to… Someone.  May I take a torch with me?”  Josh nods and lights a spare torch on the original, and Gordon watches the light bob away into the night as Jefferem runs to find someone.  He finds he’s no longer in a mood to watch the sky, instead watching the torch light flicker and sending up a prayer that it stays lit for the rest of his watch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Just before the sun rises above the horizon, Gordon’s allowed to go home.  He retires to his quarters, a private room in the barracks, and has scarcely pulled his armor off before sleep hits him around the head.  He doesn’t dream, the darkness behind his eyes deep and warm and soft.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The sun streams through his window when Gordon’s finally awoken.  He huffs at the light and turns over, thinking that was what had awoken him.  He’s quickly proven wrong when there’s a firm knock at his door.  Gordon hauls himself upright and opens the door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Captain Valencia stands in the door and Gordon straightens up so he’s standing at attention.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Relax, Freeman.”  Valencia laughs.  He takes in Gordon’s ragged appearance before meeting his gaze once again.  “There have been whispers that you had a rather… Interesting night watch.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That’s certainly one way to phrase it, sir.”  Gordon steps back from the door, inviting Valencia into his quarters.  Valencia ducks under the door frame and settles down at the table Gordon has sitting by the one window in his quarters.  “Something to drink?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Anything but ale.  My own night was certainly a different kind of interesting and I find myself with an awful headache.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Some coffee, then.”  Gordon decides, Valencia laughing once again.  Gordon brews the coffee and puts a mug in front of the two seats at the table.  He’s barely settled into his seat and taken a drink when Valencia speaks up again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The king wants to see you.”  Gordon inhales sharply, and manages to breathe nothing but coffee.  He coughs harshly and Valencia comes around the table to slap Gordon on the back.  “Breathe, man!  The king will be seriously affronted if you die before your audience with him!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You couldn’t have… Opened your visit with that?”  Gordon asks between coughs, and Valencia slaps him one more time, though Gordon’s done coughing when he does.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The report of last night’s events quickly climbed the ranks, and you have a reputation as something of an adventurer.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Aye, a decade ago!”  Anxious, Gordon stands and goes to his wardrobe, throwing it open and beginning to pick through the clothes within.  “What quest even is there to send me on?  Perhaps the God of Darkness merely threw a childish tantrum or the like last night!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Just because you’re a follower of the Sun God doesn’t mean you should blaspheme.  You’re too good of a soldier to be struck down for some insult.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“A follower of the Sun God I am not.  But… My apologies for the blasphemy.”  Gordon sighs.  “This is a truly wretched way to start the morning.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Perhaps if you would cease in going through your clothes like a boy before his first romance, you may find your nerves settle a little bit.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“It’s the </span>
  <em>
    <span>King!  </span>
  </em>
  <span>If I don’t make a good impression, I may as well throw myself on my sword!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“May the God of the Steadfast Mountain make my soul like stone as well.”  Valencia sighs.  “Very well.  I will finish my cup of coffee.  Show me your best cloths, Gordon.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Just like when we were squires.”  Gordon mutters, wringing one last laugh from Valencia.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The halls of the king of Black Mesa are made of stone etched through with veins of marble, such that the walls themselves seem to glimmer in the torchlight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Gordon’s gaze is not on the walls, however.  Instead, he watches his feet shuffle closer and closer to what will surely be his impending death.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Valencia, on his left, digs an elbow into Gordon’s side.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Straighten your back, soldier.  You slink like a scolded cat.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Aye, aye.”  Gordon spits as venomously as he can with a valet guiding the two of them through the halls.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Soon enough, they arrive, and the valet throws open the doors to the king’s Great Hall.  The room beyond could fit the entirety of the barracks, with a chandelier of gems that make the light flooding the room dance across the walls.  Various stained glass windows add to the barrage of colors, showing various myths from each god, not betraying which one the king truly follows.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>While it may be fine for someone like the Captain, an aristocrat, to reveal his faith, the king is a more paranoid sort.  Though Gordon isn’t sure how someone would go about it, the King seems convinced someone would use his faith against him, and so pays equal homage to each god.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>King Wallace sits on his throne, crown and cape nowhere to be seen.  If he wasn’t on his throne, Gordon believes he could be mistaken for some nobleman or a High Merchant.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Ah, Sir Freeman!  Captain Valencia!  Come in, come, come!”  King Wallace smiles warmly and waves both Gordon and Valencia closer.  It takes an almost awkward amount of time for the two of them to walk the length of the Great Hall.  King Wallace keeps that smile on his face until the two of them finally reach the foot of his throne and kneel down.  “You may rise.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Your Majesty.”  Valencia stands and bows, as does Gordon.  “I have brought Sir Freeman, as requested.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Yes, I see that.  How are you, Sir Freeman?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Excellent, your Majesty.”  Any trace of anxiety is gone from Gordon’s voice, and he’s made any expression leave his face until he’s nothing more than a living statue.  He may allow himself to show anxiety in his own rooms, but this is the King he’s standing in front of.  He feels rather like a swimmer praying a shark doesn’t smell any blood in the water.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That’s good.  I assume you’ve been wondering why you were summoned here.  Sir Freeman, I was told you were on the wall last night when some rather… Odd events came to pass.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Yes, I was.”  King Wallace nods and strokes his beard in thought.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Well, I have spoken with my advisors, and they believe that this was a lashing out from a rogue Explorer.”  Gordon blinks but otherwise doesn’t show his surprise.  Explorers are acolytes of the God of Darkness, called Explorers because they explore everywhere the darkness reaches, down into deep caves and high up in the forest canopy.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>On first hearing a God of Darkness existed, Gordon had been inclined to think that the God controlled everything evil and bad in the world.  But after he had accidentally broken into a Shadowed Hall, he’d learned that more than anything the God represents satisfying curiosity, replacing the dark with light long enough to see how deep the darkness goes before allowing it to take control once more.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Explorers don’t typically dabble in magic.”  Gordon murmurs and the king nods in agreement.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That is certainly true.  Tell me, Sir Freeman, have you encountered magicians in your adventures before?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, your Majesty.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Excellent.  Then it seems your days of questing for Black Mesa are not yet over.  As your king, I command you to go out and find this rogue Explorer.  They may be dangerous.  I want them captured and brought back alive.  Perhaps we could rehabilitate them.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...Yes, your Majesty.”  Gordon is quick to duck his head, so as to hide the shock on his face from the sharp eyes of the king.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Very well.  You leave in the morning.  The two of you are dismissed.”  Valencia and Gordon both bow before they leave.  Gordon has to make a conscious effort to keep walking as soon as the doors to the Great Hall close behind him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think you helped me make too good of an impression.”  Gordon hisses to Valencia under his breath, but Valencia only laughs, even if Gordon’s panic must be obvious to him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gordon, you are one of the most experienced questers in the army ranks, it only makes sense that our king would choose you for something as important and potentially dangerous as this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aye, I quested a lot!  When I was younger and trained every spare second I had!  Even the most well-forged blade rusts!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If you honestly believe you can deny the king’s command, you are certainly free to try.”  Valencia gazes at Gordon out of the corner of his eye as Gordon falls silent.  The both of them know Gordon would never dare to do such a thing.  He would be declared a traitor by the king and filled with enough arrows to mimic a tailor’s pincushion before he got beyond Black Mesa’s walls.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“All I know about the magic was the way it went.  A quest tends to rely on more information than a vague direction.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then consider this a special quest.  Alas, Gordon, you know more than even one as wise as I in this situation.  You’ll be riding blind and alone, a burden I would wish on no one.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then am I doomed?”  Gordon asks miserably, letting his head hang, and Valencia shakes him by the shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No.  You are Gordon Freeman, a knight of Black Mesa.  Your intelligence and skill with a blade have done you well thus far, and will continue to do so.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aye, captain.”  As they finally reach the door to Gordon’s quarters, he turns and embraces Valencia, his captain quick to return the gesture.  “Thank you.  For calming my worried mind.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I fear your mind will never truly be calm.”  Valencia laughs as the two break apart.  “But I am pleased to have done what I can.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then leave me to pack and go back to your ale!”  Gordon shoos Valencia away from his door, and the captain scoffs in offense even as he turns and leaves.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As the door to his quarters shuts, Gordon turns and lets his gaze roam over his room.  He’s spent ten years of his life here, and tomorrow he must abandon this lifestyle for one he’d thought he retired from.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon supposes it would be normal for him to feel melancholy, but instead he feels the first thrummings of excitement playing in his heart.  He breathes deeply and finally pushes away from the door, going to pack.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Gordon sets out on his quest, alone and unsure of where to go.</p><p>The magician who almost kills him certainly isn't helping matters.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the title of this fic is inspired by a line from Ready As I'll Ever Be from Tangled:  The Series.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>The gate in and out of Black Mesa rises precisely at dawn, and Gordon watches as the sky brightens with sunrise while the metal chains begin to rattle and move in front of him.  His horse, bought from the stables next to the barracks and named Gallant, nickers nervously at the sound.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The soldier raising the gate salutes to Gordon once the gate’s fully raised and Gordon returns the gesture with a nod.  Then he snaps the reins and rides out past the walls, veering east and riding for the horizon.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The road beneath him is well-worn and Gallant must have run it before, staying on the path and setting a sturdy gallop.  Beyond the walls of Black Mesa, most of the land is farm fields, flat and devoid of people other than the occasional cluster of huts.  This makes it easy enough for Gordon to spot other travelers, and to keep an eye out for any who may be the Explorer he seeks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon rides like this for two days, until the vast fields begin to be replaced by trees, a forest beginning to crop up around him.  Just as the moon begins to rise ahead of him, Gordon’s eyes catch a glimmer of firelight just off the road.  He turns Gallant toward the light and rides toward the light as quietly as he can.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The campfire Gordon had spotted sits in a copse of trees, and a figure in a black cloak sits huddled among the roots of one of the trees.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Pardon me?”  Gordon calls as he dismounts, and the figure in the cloak startles to their feet.  Before Gordon can speak another word, one pale hand emerges from the folds of the cloak.  Instantly, the fire winks out and Gordon feels a rush of cold air tear past him.  The cold shocks him so he can’t breathe, and Gordon chokes.  He falls to one knee and clutches at his throat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who… Have you come to kill me?”  The figure asks and Gordon can only continue to choke, words beyond him without air.  “Oh.  Oh, you need to breathe, don’t you?”  Gordon assumes the figure must have waved their hand again or something, because the fire flares back up and Gordon finds himself able to draw a deep, heaving gasp of air.  He coughs, still kneeling on the forest floor, and the figure takes half of a hesitant step towards him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I… I swear I’m not going… Going to hurt you.”  Gordon gasps and a leather waterskin lowers into his field of view.  He takes it slowly, still not trying to frighten the mysterious magician, and takes a long drink from it before blindly handing it back.  “If I stand, will you do whatever that was again?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not sure I could do it on command.”  The figure says and Gordon finally looks up.  The magician’s hood must have fallen, face clear in the light of his campfire.  His features are strong, a square jaw frowning down at Gordon as two thick black eyebrows narrow suspiciously over dark blue eyes that stare at him.  “Will you keep your word about not harming me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My word is not something I tend to go back on.”  Gordon tells the magician as he finally rises to his feet.  The magician turns away from Gordon with a twirl of his cloak and reclaims his spot amongst the tree roots.  “I… Apologize for startling you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Apology accepted.”  When the magician says nothing else, Gordon clears his throat meaningfully.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Typically, one would also apologize for nearly killing another man.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Perhaps this is not a typical situation.  Since I did believe myself fending for my life from what might have been a deranged criminal.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am neither deranged nor a criminal!”  Gordon insists as insult sparks in his chest, and the magician’s teeth gleam weirdly in the firelight as he smiles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Am I to believe a perfect stranger?  Perhaps you’ve still a knife up your sleeve or some other foul plan laying in wait.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am a knight of Black Mesa!  I would never harm an innocent person!  Mayhaps betwixt us, you are the criminal!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve no idea.”  That curdles whatever reply Gordon would’ve spat next, and he turns silently to the fire, slowly sitting down instead of waiting for an invitation.  The magician seems to realize Gordon is waiting for him to elaborate, as he heaves a burdened sigh and begins to speak.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I awoke a ways down the road, eastward.  Even now, I’ve no idea how I got there.  I scarcely know how I know my directions!  I’ve been wandering aimlessly, hoping my mind would restore itself, but instead I find both food and shelter scarce.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you know how you managed that bit of magic earlier?”  Gordon asks and receives a silent shake of the head.  “Well… Is there anything you do remember?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My name.  Benrey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My name is Gordon Freeman.”  Gordon makes the conscious decision to not remark on the oddity of Benrey’s name, seeing as Benrey has demonstrated his unpredictable magic already.  “So you’ve just been wandering out here for days?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aye, that is what I said.  You may need your hearing checked, sir knight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You insult me so readily, even when I was about to be gracious to you.”  Gordon bites his cheek to stop a smile when he sees Benrey noticeably perk up at his words.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then I make a quick apology.  Please be gracious.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Very well.  I’ve some food with me, and since you say that food is scarce here, I’d be inclined to share with you to ensure you do not starve to death.”  With that, Gordon stands and fetches some salted meat from one of his saddle bags, settling back by the fire to spear the meat and start cooking it.  There’s a moment of silence, interrupted only by the crackle of flames, before Benrey speaks up once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You said you were a knight, correct?”  Gordon nods.  “Do knights usually travel beyond their kingdoms?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, but I find myself in a bit of an unusual situation.  There was an outburst of magic in my kingdom last night and my king has tasked me with finding the rogue magician responsible and bringing them back to Black Mesa.”  Gordon blinks as he stares into the fire, before he straightens up and turns to Benrey.  “I wonder if you were the responsible party for the magic flare?”  Benrey returns Gordon’s gaze, looking oddly nervous.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve no idea.  If I was, perhaps that also caused my loss of memory.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm.”  Gordon frowns and twists the meat idly.  “Well, it hardly seems fair to imprison you for something you don’t recall doing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You could just let me go.”  Benrey suggests, but Gordon waves a hand at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nonsense, if you are responsible and I let you go now, chances are I would never find you again.  No, that wouldn’t do.”  Gordon muses on the issue some more, even as he pulls one stick of meat free from the ground and hands it over to Benrey.  Benrey practically inhales the food and Gordon looks away both for convention’s sake and for the sake of his own appetite.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once Benrey finishes eating, he tosses the stick into the fire and curls up against the tree trunk, pulling the hood of his cloak up until only his icy blue eyes are visible, flickering in the dying light.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I might have an idea.”  Gordon announces finally and Benrey startles a little, obviously having nodded off.  “My apologies, I didn’t realize you were asleep.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No apologies needed.”  Benrey mumbles as he rubs at his eyes and sits up a little straighter.  “I wasn’t asleep.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, then since you were not asleep, the idea I had should be of great interest to you.  What did you think of it?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I… Had a bug in my ear while you told me your plan.  Please repeat it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, of course.”  Gordon plays at sincerity even as he chokes on his laughter.  “Well, I used to quest in the past, and met some rather interesting individuals.  One of these individuals was a man who made potions that could do anything you could think of.  Perhaps, if he lives in the same village as before, I could bring you there and see if he has a potion that would restore your memory.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And then you’d imprison me?”  Benrey asks but Gordon shakes his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My king only told me to bring back the magician who performed the magic I witnessed.  If you are not the magician he spoke of, then it would simply make no sense for me to capture you.”  Benrey nods slowly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That… Does make sense, I suppose.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Excellent.  Then we set out for the potion maker’s tomorrow.  I’m going to sleep so you may resume not sleeping if you so choose.”  Gordon finally erupts with laughter as Benrey huffs in anger and turns away from him, his cloak draped over him like a blanket.  Gordon pulls his own bedroll out and pretends he can’t hear Benrey chuckle to himself as he lays down for the night.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he wakes up, Gordon stares up through the leaves of the trees, looking towards the navy blue sky where he can see some of the last lingering stars, as cold above him as the blade held at his throat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can I be of service to you?”  He asks, turning his eyes away from the sky to his assailant.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The assailant startles, eyes widening behind the black bauta mask they wear.  The jolt that runs through them is precisely the opportunity Gordon is waiting for, and he wrenches their wrist, slipping their knife from their grip and shoving them off of him.  They shriek as they tumble onto their back and Gordon leaps to his feet, gaze darting around the grove.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Two other assailants lean over Benrey, who’s been gagged and his voice is muffled as he yells and fights as much as he can with his hands and feet bound.  A fourth assailant is only beginning to walk into the grove, and Gordon formulates a plan in his head even as he starts to move.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon tosses the knife he took from the person leaning over him up into the air, catches it by the blade, and throws it so that it buries itself into the back of one of the assailants looming over Benrey.  As that man straightens up to scream in pain, Gordon turns to the one walking into the clearing.  He rips the assassin’s sword away from him and stabs the assassin through a lung, supporting the man he’s just stabbed with one arm as he whirls to face into the grove.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sure enough, the assassin Gordon hadn’t tossed to the ground or stabbed charges with his sword, running an already dead man clean through.  Gordon shoves the dead body forward, pulling his blade out and sending the two crashing onto the forest floor, the living man struggling under the weight of the dead one.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon runs forward, slamming his foot down onto the head of the man who’d been trying to hold Gordon hostage with a knife in his back, knocking him unconscious.  He skids onto his knees next to Benrey, ripping the gag out and slashing through his bonds before helping the magician to his feet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A little of that magical prowess you showed last night could be useful right now!”  Gordon yells as the man under the corpse finally regains his footing and rushes forward to engage Gordon in a one-on-one duel, close and intense.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You seem to be rather experienced in handling this on your own!”  Benrey calls back even as he leans over the man closest to him.  When he straightens back up, Benrey’s gingerly holding the dead man’s sword.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s the principle of the thing!”  Gordon continues to trade blows with the assassin, finally finding a weak spot and driving the metal toe of his boot into the side of the other man’s knee.  The man crumples back onto his ass but before he can even draw another breath, Gordon leans forward, grips the man’s shoulder with his left hand, and plunges his stolen sword into the man’s chest with the other.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon heaves for breath, tossing his loose hair out of his eyes before he lets go of the sword, watching as the killer falls back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hell of a way to wake up.”  Benrey mutters, leaning down and using the sword he holds to slice through the rope around his ankles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not the first time.”  Gordon straps on his own sword and begins to pack up camp.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Should I kill this last guy?”  Benrey asks, nudging the unconscious assassin with his foot, and Gordon shrugs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have your memories, you may not be comfortable with killing.  But if you want to, then be my guest, I suppose.  This group was probably professionals, which means torture won’t garner us any information.  All we can do is flee before more of the same come looking for their comrades.”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Gordon loads up both the saddle bags, he politely ignores the sound of a sword plunging into flesh behind him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“As I was saying, we’ll have to ride hard for the potion master’s village.  You’ll have to ride behind me on the way there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe while we ride, you can teach me to fight like that.”  Benrey jokes and Gordon laughs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’d be happy to.  That way you can save your own damn self next time.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I cannot believe a knight is ignoble enough to abandon a helpless civilian to leagues of fearsome killers.  Perhaps you lied about being a knight?  I need to see your coat of arms, sir.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have no family to need a coat of arms.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm.  Suspicious.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, aye?  And you’re an officer of the law now?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mayhaps.  I’ve still not got my memories.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fair enough.”  With that conversation ended, Gordon heaves himself onto Gallant’s saddle, offering a hand down to Benrey.  “I suppose you’ll have to risk riding with a fake knight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m only accompanying you because you fight so well.”  Benrey informs him, taking Gordon’s hand and scrabbling up to situate himself behind Gordon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I ought to let you get stabbed.”  Gordon tells him before he flicks Gallant’s reins and they set off.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>And thus did I realize my love of writing fight scenes</p><p>Thank you for reading!  Come say hi on Tumblr @ holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>With supplies starting to run low, Gordon and Benrey make a stop in a village.</p><p>However, something there seems... Odd.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>Gordon learns many things about Benrey in quick succession, not all of which he’s sure he actually wanted to know.  For example, Benrey seems to know precisely how to make Gordon either laugh or yell with rage, and he seems to take great pleasure in alternating between the two with a randomness that makes Gordon’s head spin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>As they travel, Gordon also learns that if it weren’t for his arrival, Benrey probably would’ve died doing something unbearably stupid.  Like fighting a bear.  Which Benrey tries to do.  Several times.  In one day.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>They travel together for two days with no sign of trouble.  But Gordon’s been on the road long enough to know that the more time that passes without trouble, the worse the trouble will be when it finally decides to strike.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>They barely start on the road the third day when a village rises up over the horizon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Thank… Somebody.”  Gordon sighs, not sure which god in particular is behind this stroke of fortune.  “Our supplies were running low enough I thought I might actually have to hunt.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Mayhaps the reason the supplies are going so fast is because you are stealing from yourself.  It tends to be the fatal flaw of every thief.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Or could it be that I have an additional supremely disruptive mouth to feed?”  Gordon asks, jabbing an elbow back so as to nudge it into Benrey’s stomach.  Benrey grunts with equal parts insult and injury, tugging at Gordon’s braided hair in retaliation.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“It could be wise for you to abandon me in this village.  If I were to continue traveling with you, I would only tell anyone we see of the criminal escorting me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“And who would believe a suspicious-looking fellow like yourself?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Benrey has no response to that, his attention already captivated by something else other than the conversation he himself began.  In this case, his attention leaps to the low huts the two of them ride past, and the slow flood of villagers who peer at them from the dust and windows.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Why do they watch us so?”  Benrey mutters, voice low enough that Gordon will be the only one to hear it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Perhaps because I am a knight.  Questing knights are few and far between, so surely I stand out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“As long as it is not me they watch.”  Benrey pulls his cloak a little bit tighter around himself, and continues to fiddle with Gordon’s braid.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You act like such a jester.  Surely you would appreciate an audience?”  Gordon asks teasingly, but Benrey only shakes his head.  “Very well.  Then we shall leave as quickly as we can.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“...Thank you.”  Gordon ignores Benrey and instead focuses on finding the market.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The merchants running the stalls also stare, and scarcely converse with Gordon, only taking his gold and shoving dried meat and vegetables towards him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The entire town seems to be struck silent by my imposing presence.”  Gordon jokes and that finally draws a chuckle from Benrey.  Gordon elects to walk in front, leading the horse by the rein while Benrey remains on the saddle.  Something about this village seems vaguely sinister to Gordon, and the hand that doesn’t guide Gallant’s reins grips his sword.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>They almost make it out of the village before disaster strikes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>From behind them, a sudden, angered cry rings out and Gordon whirls around just in time to see a man hurtling towards them, a pitchfork raised over his head, aiming straight for Benrey.  Gordon moves quickly and cuts cleanly through the handle of the pitchfork before striking the villager unconscious with the pommel of his sword.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The other villagers, witnessing the short fight, alternate between lurching back towards their homes and starting to advance towards Gordon.  He turns and pushes the reins into Benrey’s hands.  Benrey fumbles for a minute before one hand finally closes around the reins and the other reaches down to help Gordon onto the horse, their positions reversed from when they rode in.  Gordon turns his gaze back just in time to see the glimmer of sunlight off an opening window, blinding him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As he blinks the spots out of his eyes, Gordon misses the bow being lifted in the open window.  He hears the twang of the string releasing and his first thought is to push Benrey down and to shield him with his own body.  But his human reactions aren’t fast enough for him to even breathe before the arrow buries itself in his shoulder, the flint piercing his armor.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gordon?!”  Benrey calls his name, panic clear in his voice as he continues to urge Gallant on, and Gordon swallows the blood that wells from where he bit his cheek.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fine.  I’m fine.  Keep going, they might shoot at us again.”  Benrey nods and keeps his gaze forward.  Gordon turns his head back to watch the village be swallowed up by the cotton fields and the trees.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gallant’s stamina seems endless, and he continues to run until the sun, overhead at the village, streams directly into Gordon’s eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Benrey, we should stop.”  He mumbles.  When there’s no reaction, Gordon gently touches Benrey’s arm.  Benrey flinches, causing Gallant to toss his head in annoyance, and Gordon flinches as well before he steadies himself.  “Benrey, we’re safe.  We’ve fled them.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What if they followed us?”  Benrey asks and Gordon’s surprised to still hear fear in his voice.  “What if they kill us when we stop?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They didn’t, I would’ve seen them.  I’ve protected you twice already.  Do you trust me to keep you safe a third time if they are behind us?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...Yes.”  Benrey admits and pulls on the reins to slow Gallant to a walk.  Gordon sighs and winces as his shoulder twitches and shifts the arrow still in it.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We’ll need to make camp soon.  I need to get this out of me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What are you-?”  Benrey twists to face Gordon, but his voice dies in his throat when he sees the shaft of the arrow.  Benrey looks at it for a moment before his face hardens imperceptibly and he yanks at the reins, turning Gallant off the road.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait!”  Gordon cries.  “I didn’t mean this soon.  I’m fine to ride until nightfall!  We’ve still hours of daylight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I may need the daylight to see the exact depth of your stupidity.”  Benrey snaps back, finally stopping Gallant in a grove he seems to have deemed acceptable.  He leaps down from the saddle and turns to offer a hand to Gordon, who bats it away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Trust me!  I’ve had worse than this before.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Than you’re even more stupid than I previously thought.”  As soon as Gordon’s slid down off the saddle, Benrey’s tying Gallant up and fetching one of Gordon’s spare shirts from the saddle bag.  “Sit down.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve done this before.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then do it.  Surely you can contort yourself to get an arrow out of your shoulder, </span>
  <em>
    <span>friend</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”  The way Benrey says the last word is almost… Intimidating, and Gordon hesitates for a moment before dropping to the ground with an annoyed huff.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fine.  I suppose I could use some assistance… Just this once.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are all the other knights in Black Mesa as foolish as you?”  Benrey asks as he builds a fire and sets a kettle of water, poured from his waterskin and Gordon’s, to boil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am not foolish!  ...How do you know this medical knowledge?”  Gordon asks, watching as Benrey sets a knife down so its blade is in the fire, and begins to tear Gordon’s extra shirt into strips.  At Gordon’s question, though, Benrey’s hands still and his gaze catches on the middle distance for a moment.  Then he shakes his head and resumes what he was doing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do not know.  This simply… Makes sense, I suppose.  Would you rather you had to walk me through this?  That I was fumbling and didn’t even know to clean the materials beforehand?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, I much prefer this.”  Gordon is quick to assure and Benrey smiles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Get comfortable.  I highly doubt this is going to be pleasant.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I wonder why that doubt would have ever entered your mind?”  Gordon snarks even as he pulls most of his armor off, excepting the pauldron pinned to him by the arrow, and piles it by the tree before finding a spot to sit, perpendicular to the fire.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve no idea.”  Benrey returns, a second knife in hand as he saws through the shaft of the arrow, as close to the fletching as he can get.  Once the fletching is discarded on the forest floor, Benrey slowly works the pauldron up away from Gordon’s body until he’s able to pull it free and toss it aside.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright.”  Benrey mumbles under his breath and goes to get the first knife, glowing with an angry red heat, out from the fire.  “I have to expand the wound to extract the arrow without the head breaking.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know.”  Gordon mumbles as he leans his head forward to rest his cheek on his knees, face turned towards the fire.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’d assumed you knew, I thought it might be… Reassuring to inform you as to what was going on.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...Thank you.”  Gordon looks at Benrey, kneeling behind him, in his peripheral vision.  “You didn’t have to do this.  I truly could have removed this on my own.  It simply would’ve been a more arduous process.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You took this arrow protecting me.  It only makes sense that I would return the favor.”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t consciously choose to take this arrow.”  Gordon protests, even through his gritted teeth, and Benrey lifts the hand he’d laid on Gordon’s back to smack the back of Gordon’s head.  “OW!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is it so hard to believe I can be thankful for something, you moron?  I am trying to help, and you are only continuing to be foolish by antagonizing the person cutting your back open with a knife.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fine, fine!”  Gordon splutters, only to keep Benrey from attacking him again.  “I’m grateful, you unholy wretch!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Better.  I’m almost done, the arrow did not pierce that deeply.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It certainly feels like it did.”  Gordon grouses, only to interrupt himself with a yell as Benrey pulls the arrow free.  Benrey quickly wraps the cloth strips around Gordon’s shoulder and makes sure the blood won’t leak through.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There we are.  How does that feel?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Painful.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Unfortunate.  I suppose you’ll just have to suffer.”  Benrey stands to move away, but Gordon turns and catches Benrey’s hand before he can get out of reach.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am grateful for your help.  And I am… Also grateful to have met you.  Without you I would have had to pull that arrow from my shoulder myself.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m glad you appreciate me for something I do.”  Benrey jokes, but gently squeezes Gordon’s hand.  “I’m grateful to you as well, mostly because without your timely arrival, I would have starved to death.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You still might starve if you don’t stop eating the majority of the food.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is it my fault I hunger so?  I doubt it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“At least leave some for me!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon dissolves into laughter at that and finally pulls his hand free from Benrey, standing and going to get his bedroll.  As he goes to grab it, he sees the eyes of something- no, some</span>
  <em>
    <span>one</span>
  </em>
  <span>, glinting in the light of the fire.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Benrey!”  He yells in alarm just as the person emerges from the trees.  In an instant, Benrey stands behind Gordon, one hand on Gordon’s shoulder and the other thrust out towards the intruder.  Behind them, the fire snaps out silently.  Instead of the rush of cold Gordon remembers from the last time, shadows seem to come alive and streak out from every dark corner of the grove, wrapping around the intruder and throwing them harshly to the ground.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait!  W-wait, please!”  The intruder calls out and Benrey walks forward until he stands next to Gordon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who are you?  Why are you here?”  Gordon asks, turning and ripping his knife from a saddle bag before going closer to the bound intruder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My name…”  The face that stares up at Gordon is that of a young man.  Gordon thinks perhaps this man is only a few years older than Josh, and he finds himself putting his knife away, even as Benrey makes an audible sound of disapproval.  “My name is Forzen.  I followed the path from the village.  I- the knight got hit by an arrow, and…”  Forzen trails off into silence, remaining as still as he can with Benrey binding him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Release him.”  Gordon mutters to Benrey, who turns sharply to look at him.  “He won’t harm us, Benrey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And yet he lurks beyond the firelight like a predator.”  Benrey growls but pulls his hand back to his side.  Forzen grunts in pain as the shadows lift him slightly, before dissipating and dropping him onto the ground.  Gordon elbows Benrey, who only huffs and goes to relight the fire.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Have you come to finish what your village started?”  Gordon asks and Forzen shakes his head as he climbs to his feet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“At one point in my life, I had the desire to travel to one of the larger kingdoms, to become a knight.  It never happened, but my village’s doctor trained me to care for some wounds.  I thought perhaps I could’ve been of assistance.”  Forzen’s voice trails off into silence and his gaze leaves Gordon’s face to instead watch his own feet as they kick anxiously at the dirt.  Gordon blinks before he smiles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I suppose your intentions are the most important part.  And it seems you had good ones.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Rather useless ones, now, though.”  Forzen nods at Gordon’s wrapped shoulder.  “I cannot be of any help.  And I doubt my own village would welcome me back.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mayhaps you could travel with us?”  Gordon gestures between himself and Benrey, who’s steadfastly ignoring the two of them in favor of poking at the campfire with a stick.  “We travel to seek the help of a potion master.  He lives in one of the larger kingdoms you claim you wanted to journey to, if you still have that longing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Surely I would be a burden-”  Forzen starts to say, but Gordon’s quick to cut him off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If there is any task we need your help with, I’ve no doubt you’d be willing to help us even if we were enemies.  You seem a good sort.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And you seem… Overly trusting.”  Forzen jokes and Benrey snorts where he sits by the fire.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“At least the intruder shows some intelligence.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Come sit with us.  I’m Sir Gordon Freeman.  This is Benrey.”  Gordon purposefully ignores Benrey’s jab and guides Forzen to the warmth and light of the fire, before he sits down next to Benrey.  “We can set out in the morning.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This might only be possible if you do not snore tonight.”  Benrey jabs yet again, and this one gets a reaction from Gordon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do not!  Snore!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you calling your traveler of almost a week a liar?  I thought knights were supposed to be chivalrous.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“To be so unchivalrous is rather surprising behavior for one of your ranking, Sir Freeman.”  Forzen chimes in quietly and Benrey lets loose with a delighted cackle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Perhaps I should leave you two magpies to chatter while I sleep.”  Gordon huffs in offense and Benrey pats his uninjured shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It might be best.  Sleep will help that shoulder of yours heal faster.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You are not my nurse.”  Gordon retorts and Benrey arches an eyebrow at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I could knock you unconscious with the butt of your own sword, that would ensure you get some rest.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There’s no need for violence like that.”  Gordon grouses, interrupting himself at one point to yawn.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There is if you won’t sleep.”  Benrey tells him, and at this point Forzen’s already unpacked his own bedroll and fallen asleep.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fine!  But you have to as well.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I never said I wasn’t going to.”  Benrey flicks his hood up to hide his face and Gordon watches as he leans back against the trunk of a tree.  His eyes glint from within, tracking Gordon as he spreads his own bedroll on the ground.  But instead of crawling in, Gordon spreads the blanket out and turns back to Benrey.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Share it with me.”  Benrey’s eyes blink in confusion and he slowly reaches up, lowering his hood.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why would you want to do that?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Surely you’re not comfortable sleeping against a tree trunk.  How can I expect you to keep patching me up if you’re exhausted?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I thought you said I wasn’t your nurse?”  Benrey snarks, even as he stands and walks over.  Gordon looks away as Benrey unfastens his cloak, and Benrey chuckles at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Preserving my decency?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It feels odd to see you without it on.  Wrong, almost.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Dramatic.”  Benrey kneels on the bedroll next to Gordon, cloak held in one hand.  As soon as they both lay down, Benrey spreads the cloak over them.  Gordon closes his eyes and falls asleep quickly, breathing in the scent of Benrey’s cloak, something that smells like rainwater and caves.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I really appreciate all the love this fic has gotten so far!  And I'm also glad y'all are enjoying the formal English and the banter, both were a lot of fun to write!</p><p>Come say hi on Tumblr @holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The travelers finally arrive to the kingdom of Aperture.</p><p>Now all Gordon can do is hope the potions master is still willing to help them.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>The walls of the kingdom they walk toward loom overhead, blotting out the sun and casting the three into cool shadows.  Forzen and Benrey both shuffle nervously, but Gordon keeps his shoulders relaxed and gaze forward.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The guards will halt us if we act too suspicious.”  He tells the other two, not even glancing sideways at them, as they continue to draw nearer to the gates.  “And with none of us able to prove who we are, they will simply toss us in prison and leave us to rot.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You desperately need a coat of arms.”  Benrey tells him, and Gordon’s gaze finally flicks to him as his eyes narrow with exaggerated annoyance.  “It would be useful for situations like this, instead of praying that we get lucky.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Whose domain would luck fall under?”  Forzen asks, even as he manages to make himself look decently intimidating with a dreadful glare.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I’ve no idea.”  Gordon shrugs.  “None of the gods’ domain is exactly clearly outlined.  They’re all… Vague concepts and the like.”  Gordon waves his hand in the air, trying to illustrate his point.  Forzen smirks slightly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“So I suppose you’re one of those people who doesn’t follow any of the gods?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“None of them have ever appeared to me or done anything for me.  Why should I believe in them when they’ve given me reason to?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“So you expect the gods to recruit their own followers?”  Benrey asks and Gordon shrugs.  “That sounds exhausting.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, if gods are capable of anything, shouldn’t they have limitless energy as well?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I highly doubt the gods are truly as powerful as you believe them to be.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I tend to pray to the god of families.”  Forzen announces, interrupting Gordon and Benrey’s bickering.  Simultaneously, the other two turn to look at him, and Forzen manages not to quail under their gazes.  “They seem like the kindest god.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But what do you pray </span>
  <em>
    <span>for</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”  Gordon asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nothing.  I stopped making requests of the gods when I realized I couldn’t simply be blessed with everything I wanted.  I had to have goals, ones I knew I could achieve.  I kept praying after that because I felt like the other villagers would notice if I never visited the shrine again.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And did the god ever do anything for you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not that I could prove-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“HA!”  Gordon interrupts to shout at Benrey and Forzen glares at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I couldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>prove</span>
  </em>
  <span> that the god provided anything for me.  But by visiting the shrine, I gained the self-awareness to provide for myself.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I may know something else the gods have provided for us.”  Benrey interjects into the conversation once more.  Both Gordon and Forzen, distracted from their conversation, turn to look as Benrey gestures widely around the group at their surroundings.  Though they obligingly look around, Benrey sighs with aggravation.  “We’re inside the city, you fools.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh!”  Once it’s pointed out to him, Gordon finally notices what he hadn’t before.  Benrey begins to laugh at Gordon’s lack of observation and Gordon ignores the heat of his embarrassment, pointedly not looking at Benrey.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, while we may not agree on whether gods exist, we can certainly agree that miracles do, considering Gordon’s continued survival is a miracle in and of itself.”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Where does this potions master of yours live?”  Forzen asks, before Gordon can respond to Benrey’s insult.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He lives on the outer ring of town.  We’re already on the right path, and we should be there shortly.  Do you still plan to stay in this kingdom, Forzen?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do not intend to doubt your friend’s abilities, but I’m unsure how long the two of you would continue to seek answers if this solution were to… Fall through.  I doubt I could stand to be on the road for however long.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Very well.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So you’d listen to his complaints, but force me to continue journeying with you?”  Benrey asks with a grin, and Gordon huffs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If it is </span>
  <em>
    <span>your </span>
  </em>
  <span>memories we intend to restore, then </span>
  <em>
    <span>you </span>
  </em>
  <span>must help seek out the solution!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why could you not just return to where I am with the antidote?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How would I know it worked without testing it on you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’d simply have to keep going to and fro until one of them worked.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No.  I would die of old age on the road.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sir Freeman, please tell me you still know where we’re going.”  Forzen breaks the argument up and Gordon glances around quickly, comparing his memories of his last visit here to the streets currently walk.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, we’ve drawn nearer.  In fact…”  Gordon pauses as he speaks, turning down an alley, the rest of the group trailing behind him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When they emerge from the small passage, they seem to have emerged into a wooded area close to the wall that surrounds Aperture.  Homes here have thinned out, and Gordon glances around.  He finally gives a triumphant cry when his gaze lands on a sturdy, decently-sized cabin.  “There!  Now we only need to hope he still lives there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That thought never occurred to me.”  Forzen mutters, looking nervous once again, but Gordon has already set off towards the house.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon raps on the door to the cabin while Benrey ties Gallant up to a hitching post in a grassy patch nearby.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes?”  A voice calls as slowly, the door creaks open.  A man, clutching a glass flask in one hand, dressed in dark purple robes with salt and pepper hair, stares blankly at Gordon.  Neither Gordon nor the man say anything, but almost simultaneously, twin grins spread across their faces.  Still clutching to the empty flask, the man who’d answered the door throws his arms about Gordon, clinging to him.  Gordon laughs and readily returns the embrace.  “Sir Freeman, I haven’t laid eyes on you in gods only know how many years!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think the number is about twelve, Darnold.  And I swear I’ve told you to call me Gordon.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I can’t be expected to remember that, as it’s been twelve years.”  Darnold smiles and finally pulls back from the embrace, eyes taking in every aspect of Gordon’s face, taking in the changes that time has brought about.  “You got old, Sir Knight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“As did you, Potions Maker!”  When Darnold’s gaze lands on Benrey and Forzen, Gordon whirls around.  “Let me introduce my companions to you:  This is Benrey, an Explorer magician of unknown origins.  The other is Forzen, an aspiring knight from a small village down the road.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Pleased to meet both of you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The feeling is mutual.”  Benrey smiles tightly and Forzen remains silent, only nodding his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Unknown origins, you said?”  Darnold looks back to Gordon, who moves from Darnold’s side to Benrey’s.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aye.  I met him on the road.  We’ve come to see if his memory could be restored through the employment of your magicks.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, I certainly don’t carry the title of ‘Master’ for nothing.  Come in, come in, lest you melt in the sun!”  Darnold ushers the entirety of the group into the house, leading the way through a comfortable living room down a staircase into a cellar, lined with smooth, bright stone.  Several benches sit scattered around the room, topped with machines whose purposes couldn’t even be guessed at.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’ve filled this room more than when I was last here.”  Gordon remarks and Darnold’s smile speaks of delight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Indeed!  The Queen of Aperture employs me personally.  With the funding of the kingdom behind me, I can afford to purchase and create the finest tools I could need!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then you’ve done quite well for yourself.”  Gordon grips Benrey’s elbow and pulls the magician up to stand beside him instead of lurking behind him.  “And I must ask for your expertise.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, of course.  I have… A bench in one of the closets if you or… Forzen, was it?”  At the nod, Darnold smiles.  “If one of you want to pull it out, you may wait there while I consult with Benrey here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Forzen goes to set the bench up, and Gordon watches on as Darnold begins to interrogate Benrey, a potion slowly coming together in dashes and pinches of ingredients as Benrey answers each of Darnold’s questions.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You seem nervous.”  Gordon mutters to Forzen when he finally joins the younger man on the bench.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A city as large as this… Even a house as large as this!  It’s like nothing I’ve ever seen before.”  Forzen gestures widely around him before he quickly pulls his arms back to himself.  “I admit it all seems… Frightening.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If you find this more frightening than Benrey using his magic on you, then you will make a perfect knight.”  Gordon nudges Forzen’s shoulder gently with his own.  “It will be your duty to never falter in the face of danger or the unexplainable.  But you’re always able to balk at the things others would find mundane.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good.”  Forzen rubs his hands up and down his arms, before seeming to settle into himself in some imperceptible way and smiling back at Gordon.  “Thank you.”  Before Gordon can respond, Darnold’s voice calls out to the two of them from across the laboratory.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The potion is ready!  Come here!”  Quickly, the two knights abandon their bench, darting between and around benches until they come to where Darnold is holding a glass vial up to the light.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The liquid in the vial churns like a thunderstorm, purple lightning flashing through the blue slime, and Benrey watches it light up with apprehension clearly visible in every line of his face.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You still trust me, right?”  Gordon asks Benrey in a whisper, and Benrey nods, even as he stares at the vial being pushed into his hands.  “Then drink it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mayhaps I should recant my previous statement.”  Benrey snarks back, but raises the vial to his lips anyway, the slime slowly disappearing as he drinks the entire disgusting dose.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He gags when he finishes, and Darnold hurriedly snatches the vial before backing up in case Benrey becomes ill.  Gordon rubs soothing circles on Benrey’s back, and slowly the nauseous look on Benrey’s face fades away until he can stand up straight again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How long will the potion take to work?”  Gordon asks Darnold, who watches Benrey’s face closely.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It should have already begun to work.  Benrey, what is the very first thing you remember?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Standing on a road.”  Benrey replies after a pause and the air becomes heavy with disappointment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Very well.  We’ll simply have to try again.”  Darnold turns to his work station before he freezes and turns back around to face Gordon.  “Gordon, there’s a temple for the God of Past and Future Knowledge.  Go make a sacrifice to him.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Would the god even answer a non-believer?”  Gordon asks and Darnold nods patiently, much like if he were dealing with a child.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course.  He’ll know you’re making the sacrifice on behalf of one who does believe.  Now get going, I hope he’ll bless me with the correct potion recipe.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon grumbles as he leaves Darnold’s home, setting off through the streets of Aperture and wandering aimlessly.  Though he may not believe in the god, Gordon will admit to himself that the Temples for said god have a way of just… Showing up in one’s path.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And sure enough, Gordon turns the corner, following the smell of fresh bread, and comes to stand directly in front of a Temple.  Books lay strewn about the marble steps, free to be placed or taken as anyone passing by desires.  People sit in between giant piles of books, reading them, discussing them, hell, ripping the pages out and burning them.  That fellow gets carted away rather quickly, though, so Gordon instead returns his attention to the revolving doors that are the entrance to the Temple proper.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Inside, art lines every wall, drawn onto the wall itself or hung carefully in frames.  There are more books scattered about, but some of them lie empty.  Gordon carefully picks his way across the floor until he reaches the sacrificial altar:  A cozy fire pit placed in a lowered section of the temple.  Families sit around it, some reading and some roasting food.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon lowers himself down onto a section of floor covered with a plush blanket.  Reaching into one of the pouches of his belt, he extracts a little woven doll.  His mother had taught him how to make these, and it had helped his hands learn to steady when he needed them to.  He throws the doll into the fire and the fire seems to flare up for a moment as soon as the little doll finishes burning.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“May I sit here?”  A voice asks from Gordon’s left and he turns, meeting someone’s knee.  Gordon tilts his head back and blinks up at the man who smiles down at him.  The man has short dark brown hair that falls into his gold eyes, and Gordon knows he would be at least a foot taller if Gordon were to stand.  He’s dressed like the other worshippers, the Collectors, in a simple yellow tunic and black pants, though he has gold bangles on his wrists, chains around his neck, and gold makeup dusting his eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The man tilts his head, and Gordon realizes he never answered his question.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, of course!  Sorry, I seem to be stuck in my own head.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A feeling I, hm, understand well at times.”  Gently, the other man settles onto the ground next to Gordon.  “I saw you throw… Something into the fire.  Were you making a sacri- uh, offering?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes.  I’m not- I mean, I was making it for a friend of mine.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hmm.”  The man looks Gordon up and down out of the corner of his eye.  “Yes, you don’t-  You wouldn’t believe in any of the gods, would you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How did you-?”  Gordon begins to ask but the stranger cuts himself off with a chuckle.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“My apologies.  I probably should’ve introduced myself first.  My name is Thomas, but I ask that you call me Tommy.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My name is Gordon.”  The two shake hands before Tommy reclines back against the step again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Your problems can’t be solved with a sacrifice.”  Tommy tells him and Gordon nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know.  But Darnold asked this of me and who am I to deny an old friend?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not the memory problems.  Gordon, I believe your problems run deeper than that.  There have been whispers about an Explorer here in Aperture.  Not only are there mysterious assassins after him from who knows where, but Queen Gladys has heard of his arrival and plans to send her own forces after him.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What do I do?”  Gordon asks, panic thrumming through him.  Tommy reaches out and lays a comforting hand on Gordon’s shoulder.  Almost instantly, the panic fades away and Gordon lifts his eyes to meet Tommy’s steady gaze.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I cannot see what your future holds.  Something obscures my vision.  But I believe you do not need any choices made for you, Sir Freeman.  You already know what should be done in your heart.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...Yes.  Yes, I do.”  Gordon stands and looks into the heart of the fire.  “I can’t thank you enough, Tom-”  But when he turns to face his new friend, he finds the man has vanished, leaving nothing in his wake but the scent of old books.  Gordon blinks and shakes his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before he can linger on what just happened for too long, Gordon runs from the Temple and back to Darnold’s house, bursting through the door and into the basement.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“-sure the slug is truly necessary?”  Benrey finishes.  Gordon comes down into the basement and stops Benrey from downing the latest potion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We need to go.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What’s happened?”  Benrey asks even as Darnold takes the potion back from him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The god didn’t answer my prayer, but I overheard a rumor that Queen Gladys is going to send troops out to find the rogue Explorer.  We need to go, lest they discover and capture you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re right.  You may be an excellent fighter, but I doubt even you could take on an entire army.”  Gordon smiles tightly at Benrey’s words before turning to Forzen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you still plan to stay within this city?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do.”  Forzen nods and Gordon lays a hand on his shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have no way of knowing if we will ever see you again, so this must be our goodbye.  I hope you find a place to stay.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You may stay with me.”  Darnold interrupts.  “I’ve need of an assistant, at least until you start your training to become a knight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you.”  Forzen nods and Gordon goes to Darnold, laying his hands on the potions master’s shoulders.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am sorry we could not stay longer, old friend.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do not apologize for that.  As long as you visit me again sometime this century, I will bear no ill will towards you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A deal I am happy to accept.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for your help.”  Benrey tells Darnold, who nods and begins to push Benrey and Gordon out of the laboratory.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am sorry my potions failed.  But now, you must flee!  There is an Explorer temple on the road to Black Mesa, mayhaps you should see if Benrey’s god would be willing to help him.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I see no other options.”  Gordon tells Benrey, who shrugs without comment.  Together, the two of them exit Darnold’s house and saddle up Gallant, the horse shaking his head with a huff.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So we travel once more.”  Benrey tells Gordon, his hands looping under Gordon’s arms to rest on his shoulders.  “I do not think I mind it as much as I did in the beginning.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That almost sounded like a compliment.”  Gordon grins even as he turns Gallant towards the gates of Aperture and sets off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Me, compliment a master thief?  Never.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good, for I would never accept such a thing from a crazed sorcerer.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Benrey’s laughter is the only thing left behind as the two ride past the gates of Aperture and journey further down the road once again.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I really enjoyed the world building in this chapter!  The temple Gordon visits is the one thing I'm most proud of this chapter!  And again, thank you for reading!</p><p>You can come say hi on Tumblr @holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Gordon and Benrey set off for the Explorer Temple.</p><p>Gordon finds himself having to confront what he believes in.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>There are two roads between Black Mesa and Aperture, both curved in opposite directions.  The northern road’s branches reach as far up as the snow-covered Mountains while the southern’s branches reach the Lava Fields.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Currently, Gordon and Benrey ride south, Benrey keeping an eye out for attackers while Gordon makes sure they aren’t about to run their horse to death.  He would rather die before he said so out loud, but he’s afraid of what might happen upon them if they were to stop and rest for the night.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Benrey seems to be able to read Gordon’s mind, as he turns around in the saddle to rest his chin on Gordon’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We need to rest.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“No, we don’t.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Alright, I need to rest.  And I will leap from this saddle if you do not stop for the night.  You’d be responsible for any injuries I obtain.  Is that something you secretly desire?  To injure me?  Mayhaps I do not even need to leap from this saddle, you may even draw your sword and-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I yield, I yield!”  Gordon snaps and slows Gallant to a walk, beginning to search for a place to sleep.  “You know I don’t wish you injury, right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Don’t be stupid, of course I do.  You took an arrow protecting me, it seems foolish to do that and then stab me.  Though you are a fool, so.”  Gordon barks a laugh at that.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Well, if you’re going to leap from the saddle, I’m certainly not going to stop you.  All I ask is you make sure the horse is walking when you do it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That seems a simple enough request.  Gordon, look, we could sleep over there.”  Benrey’s hands wrap around Gordon’s own as he grips the reins, warm and soft as they pull Gallant towards a grove, an old fire showing other travelers had slept here sometime before the two of them arrived.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“If you’ll start setting up the camp, I’ll do a patrol to make sure we’re truly alone here.”  Benrey nods as Gordon slides down from the saddle, sword unsheathed as he begins to investigate the bushes and undergrowth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The sun’s almost completely set by the time Gordon’s satisfied the two of them are completely alone.  Benrey already has a cheerful little fire blazing, the last bits of their salted meat cooking along with some of the vegetables.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You seem to be making a feast fit for a king tonight.”  Gordon remarks as he finally allows himself to get comfortable.  Benrey rolls his eyes with a little grin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Not fit for a king at all, merely a knight and his companion.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I might be a king someday, you never know.”  Gordon smiles and Benrey looks distinctly unimpressed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Gordon, do you even know how the line of succession works?  You cannot simply lay eyes upon the throne and claim it for your own.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“How are you to say?  Without memories, you can’t even recall how the aristocracy works.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Fine, mayhaps your king keeps his throne well-hidden to keep a peasant like you from looking at it and ascending it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Sadly, he does.  I know there are rumors he has a special vault deep underground-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Are you sure you don’t speak of a crypt?”  Gordon’s composure snaps like a twig and he descends into heaving laughter, falling onto his back as Benrey cackles next to him.  Overhead, he hears a flock of birds startle at the disturbance and that only serves to make him laugh harder, until his vision swims and his ribs ache.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Slowly, their laughter dies down and Gordon sighs, watching embers rise up and vanish among the stars.  He turns his head and looks at Benrey, whose gaze is still fixed in the depths of the fire.  His dark blue eyes glint in the light and a faint smile still lingers on his lips.  Gordon looks down to where one of Benrey’s hands is resting on the ground, palm down.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Slowly, not even sure himself why he’s doing this, Gordon weaves his fingers with Benrey’s.  Benrey jolts in shock and Gordon’s about to pull away when Benrey’s hand tightens around his, gaze flicking to him with a smile.  Gordon smiles back and turns to look at the fire.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Neither of them say anything until Gordon registers some odd odor, and his nose wrinkles as he takes a deeper breath.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you smell that?”  He asks, turning to Benrey, who lunges towards the fire with a curse.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I cooked the food for too long!”  That makes Gordon dissolve into laughter all over again, and Benrey makes him take the kebab that’s been more burnt, something that Gordon’s not going to complain about when Benrey sits next to him, their knees knocking together while he eats with occasional annoyed huffs of air.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon struggles to wake up the next morning.  Instead of it coming as easily as it usually does, Gordon finds he has to fight and claw his way out of the pits of sleep just to crack his eyes open.  The moon hovers overhead, but Gordon’s struck with the feeling that the moon looking down at him isn’t the same moon he’d stared up at when he fell asleep.  Had he slept the entire day away?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What’s… Wrong with me?”  Gordon asks himself out loud.  Benrey doesn’t respond and the storm in Gordon’s stomach churns violently as he looks around the campsite.  The fire Benrey’d built last night has gone out, ashes and charred logs kicked around the campsite.  Benrey’s cloak still hangs on one of the branches of a nearby tree and Gordon finally pushes himself to his feet.  He staggers over to the cloak and gently pulls it down, looking at it and then the destroyed campsite once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He knows they took Benrey.  But he doesn’t know what to do from there.  The air around him is completely silent and Gordon knows without further investigation that whoever took Benrey also killed Gallant.  Whatever herbs forced on Gordon are still affecting him, and Gordon shivers with what feels like the beginnings of a fever.  Without thinking too deeply about it, Gordon wraps Benrey’s cloak around himself and walks deeper into the forest, using the trees around him as support.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He isn’t sure where he’s going, vague ideas of finding a village spinning through his head, though they’re mostly overpowered by the pain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Through the pounding of his blood in his ears, Gordon begins to hear the lapping of waves on a shore.  He must be stumbling his way towards a lake.  Gordon can only hope this isn’t one of the lakes ringed with cliffs, as he doesn’t want to fall to his death.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The grass under Gordon’s feet turns to rocks, sharp and easily slicing through the skin of his feet.  Gordon just keeps walking until his feet are submerged in the water, the tide carrying his blood away and soothing the cuts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Have you… Realized what is happening?”  A voice asks and Gordon nods his head.  “Good.  Then it seems it is time for you… To wake up.”  A sound like fingers snapping reverberates across the water, causing ripples to appear, and Gordon finds the fog over his mind has vanished suddenly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He tries to stagger back, out of the water, but the tide seems to rise to meet him, until the water’s lapping at the tree line.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What is this?”  Gordon asks, not expecting a response.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I find it easier to communicate when we are… In my territory.  So to speak.”  The mist covering the surface of the lake darkens, until a figure emerges from it and slowly walks towards Gordon across the water.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The figure resolves itself into a man, two heads taller than Gordon and dressed in black robes with a bright blue trim.  The hem of his cape slides behind him, gliding across the water’s surface without taking on any water itself.  Water droplets fall from the man’s hair, though it remains oiled back.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon feels fear rise up in him, along with a sense of inevitability.  Who or whatever this man is, he’s already shown Gordon there’s no possible escape.  Thus, to Gordon, it seems a waste of energy to panic.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who are you?”  Gordon demands and the monster chuckles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sir Freeman, I hope I do not.  Frighten you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I feel you would be displeased with my answer were I honest with you.”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am not here to harm you.  Rather, I feel that you are… In need of my assistance.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is this about Benrey?”  Gordon asks and the man nods, walking a little closer without Gordon retreating any further.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes.  Your friend has been… Captured by a band of knights who work for Black Mesa.  They forced a sleeping draught down your throat.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’d figured as much.  But how can you help me remedy that?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sir Freeman, surely you know… No, you wouldn’t.  Tommy warned-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You know Tommy?”  Gordon steps forward at that and the man smiles more easily, almost seeming to soften around the edges.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes.  I am a rather proud… Father.  But I believe the game is ended.  You know who we are.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No.  No, I-I don’t.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes.  You do.”  Gordon wants to continue arguing, but he knows that every moment that passes, Benrey’s situation worsens.  Instead, he sighs and bows his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You and your son… You’re gods.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good, Sir Freeman.  Yes.  I know that it is hard… To be forced to face what you believe to be… Unreal.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If it helps save Benrey, I’d believe in anything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good.  Keep up that attitude.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But how do we save him?”  The man reaches out, close enough to touch Gordon now, and gently wraps both of his hands around one of Gordon’s.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“As I said before, I may be able to… Assist you.  But I doubt it will be pleasant for you.  Our best course of action is to.  Let me control you, only momentarily.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why do you have to do that?”  Gordon asks, trying to pull his hand back and away, but this god’s grip is like iron, and just as cold on the warm skin of Gordon’s hand.  After a moment, when Gordon stops struggling, the man releases his grip.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gods cannot directly interfere with the lives of mortals.  Contrary to popular belief, we do not… ‘Smite’ non-believers.  But if I were to… Act through you, then I would be able to… Defeat the mortals who took Benrey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t understand.  If you don’t lie when you say you’re a god… Why do you care about some Explorer?  He doesn’t even follow you!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That, Sir Freeman is something… Something you don’t need to know as of this moment.  Now.  Do we have an agreement?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I…”  Gordon glances between the man’s face and his outstretched hand.  Then, he takes a deep breath and winches his eyes shut, one hand darting out to complete the handshake.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>All of a sudden, the hand Gordon’s holding is gone, and Gordon opens his eyes to see the man has vanished.  He tries to turn his head to look for the man, but he finds his body won’t obey his instructions.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’ll find you won’t be in… Control for most of this.”  The god’s awkward cadence infects Gordon’s voice, causing him to lilt and stall on words in a way he never would if he was in control of what he was saying.  But he’s not in control.  As soon as he shook that god’s hand, he resigned himself to becoming a passenger in his own body.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The water under Gordon shifts, regaining its fluidity.  That’s all the warning he gets before the solid surface he’s standing on vanishes and Gordon falls beneath the water.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Further and further down he goes, head tilted back to watch the water over his head darken.  Apparently he has as little control over the insides of his body as he does the outsides, because even as he heads for the bottom of the lake, Gordon’s lungs still work normally, still breathe air even as water presses up against him, even as it entirely fails to wet his armor or skin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he’s far enough underwater that the water is all the same dark shade of blue, something… Happens.  Gordon would never be able to put the vague feeling into words, but suddenly the water around him feels different.  Suddenly the direction he’s traveling has changed, suddenly his head tilts back once again to watch as the surface brightens instead of darkening.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon rises from the water with little fanfare, popping up above the surface like he’d always been standing there.  His eyes scan across the shore until finally they settle upon the modest little camp that had been constructed by the water’s edge.  Benrey sits leaned against the trunk of one of the trees, gagged with his hands and feet bound.  He looks blisteringly angry, but Gordon’s just pleased they didn’t drug Benrey like they did him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The three knights sit talking around a campfire, laughing and jeering like magpies, some of it directed towards Benrey, but most of it directed towards each other.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Most mortals cannot… Walk on water.”  The god possessing Gordon mumbles and walks their shared body across the surface of the lake, parallel to the camp and hidden in the darkness of a moonless night.  “While I would act as normal… I feel it would only be detrimental to you if word of your supposed godhood made its way back to.  Black.  Mesa.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon would nod if he could move his own head.  Instead, the god moves them into the foliage of the forest, unsheathing Gordon’s sword as he creeps towards the camps.  Gordon finds himself strategizing even as he knows he has no control over what happens next.  By the light-hearted chatter still flowing, none of the knights had heard his stealthy approach.  His best chance is to wait, until they drop off to sleep, take out the one on watch, and secret Benrey away before the other two wake to find their companion slain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The god controlling him decides to take a course of action better described as ‘brute force’.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Without making a sound, he lunges out from the foliage, driving his sword clean through the cuirass of the knight with his back to Gordon.  The knight slumps over, heart destroyed, and Gordon lunges for one of the other knights before they can even reach for their weapons.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He dispatches the second knight with a slashing blow to the throat that nearly severs his head, and turns to face the last knight, who’s managed to arm himself with a dagger.  Gordon lunges forward and the two lock their blades together, metal screeching against metal in a horrific cacophony of sound.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How did you find us?”  The knight asks when the two finally break apart, chests heaving.  Gordon says nothing, running forward again and slashing out.  The knight only parries the sword once again, so instead Gordon drops it, instead running forward to grab the knight about the waist and grapple him to the ground.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hot bites of pain burst up in Gordon’s back as the knight repeatedly stabs him with the dagger.  When the knight finally falls to the ground, he loses his grip on his dagger, leaving it embedded in Gordon’s back.  With one hand, Gordon pins the knight to the ground by his throat, while the other reaches up behind him and pulls the knife free.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The knight makes choking noises, air cut off by Gordon’s hand, but Gordon simply slips the dagger between the knight’s ribs.  The two men struggle until eventually, the knight goes slack and Gordon’s able to fall backwards off the body.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’s still breathing heavily as he stands, turning to Benrey, who watches him with wide eyes.  Gordon walks towards him and uses his sword to cut the bindings, carefully pulling the gag free.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gordon?”  Benrey asks, voice whisper-quiet, and the god tilts Gordon’s head consideringly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I would feel guilty… Leaving this body more damaged than when I commandeered it.”  Gordon’s back flashes again, cold as the lake water, and tears spring to his eyes, falling without his permission.  “Hello… Benrey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re not Gordon.”  Benrey watches the god with a suspicious glare, and Gordon’s head nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry.  I was just leaving.”  Gordon shudders violently, every nerve lighting up for one brief moment before the sensation fades and he drops to his knees like a puppet with severed strings.  Benrey crawls on his knees towards Gordon, hands gently lifting his lolling head.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gordon?  Are you alright?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you?”  Gordon asks, numb hands gripping at Benrey’s wrists.  “They… I didn’t even wake up when they took you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They poured some kind of mixture down your throat.  You fought, but I’m not surprised you don’t remember.  I was… I didn’t want to leave you there, alone.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m just glad you’re safe.”  Benrey smiles softly, eyes glimmering in the light thrown out by the last embers dying in the fire.  Gordon thinks about how close he came to losing this, losing Benrey’s smile in the fire, just for him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon isn’t completely stupid, he knows he and Benrey have grown closer over the course of their travels together.  He simply isn’t prepared for his affections to rush over him like a tidal wave, leaving him confused and blinking.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do we want to settle down for the night?”  Benrey asks after a long moment of silence.  He starts to pull his hands away, and Gordon doesn’t so much as make a decision as find he’s already moving.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Using the grip he has on Benrey’s wrists, Gordon pulls Benrey closer until Benrey’s hands are over Gordon’s shoulders and the two are nose to nose.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I was… Scared.”  Gordon admits quietly, into the air between them.  “Scared I’d never see you again.  I was so frightened, so desperate to see you again, that I made a deal with a god.  I would’ve believed in anything in that moment as long as it meant I got to see you again.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There’s a long moment where Benrey stares at Gordon, eyes searching his, before he smiles and huffs a laugh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure Forzen would be very pleased to hear you accept that gods are real now.”  Before Gordon can start to protest, Benrey tilts his head and leans in to press his lips to Gordon’s.  Gordon’s brain flickers before he releases Benrey’s wrists, instead hauling Benrey into his lap and letting Benrey curl his fingers into Gordon’s braid and distractedly unravel it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon isn’t sure how long they sit there, kissing in the night, but the fire is well and truly out by the time they break apart, and Benrey staggers slightly as he goes to relight it.  Gordon laughs and Benrey makes a face at him before turning back.  Slowly, Gordon looks around the camp.  The bodies of the knights are still littered around, and he stands, hauling them down to the lake shore and pushing them in until he’s sure the high tide will carry them away.  With that done, Gordon begins to take inventory of what the knights had in their saddlebags.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is it wrong of us to take their things?”  Benrey asks, even as he unrolls one of the knights’ bedrolls.  Gordon thinks for a moment before shrugging and dropping onto the bedroll next to Benrey.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If it is, there is no one around who could judge us for it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t even realize you were still wearing my cloak.”  Benrey smiles as he fingers the fabric, and Gordon unfastens it so the two of them may once again use it as a blanket.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I couldn’t leave it behind.  It reminded me of you.”  Gordon punctuates the statement with a loud kiss to Benrey’s cheek, and Benrey cackles even as he hides his face in Gordon’s chest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re going to be a nightmare to deal with.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is that a bad thing?”  Gordon asks, eyes already drifting shut, and he can feel Benrey’s smile through his shirt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No.  Not at all.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Annnnd they're together!  I hope y'all liked this chapter!</p><p>Come say hi on Tumblr @holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Gordon sleeps peacefully, unaware that war lingers on the horizon.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>Gordon sleeps deeper than he did under the influence of the knights’ drugs, only roused by multiple sharp things digging into the shoulder he isn’t laying on.  There’s no urgency to this awakening, at least not until he opens his eyes to meet the beady gaze of the hawk perched on his shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Gordon doesn’t flinch, not with talons and a beak so close to the tender meat of his face.  Instead, he takes the scroll the hawk carries tied around one leg, lets the bird tilt its head at him, and watches as it flies away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Whuzzat?”  Benrey asks, back still pressed to Gordon’s chest, and Gordon buries his fingers into Benrey’s hair, equal parts stroking it and working out little tangles as gently as he can.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Some official proclamation from Black Mesa.  The birds are trained to recognize knights on sight… Somehow.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Odd.  Going back to sleep now.”  Benrey does exactly that, dropping off with a speed Gordon envies.  Gordon, now thoroughly awakened, sits up to read the proclamation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <em>
    <span>‘Be wary, knights of Black Mesa.  On this, the eve of war, our enemy the kingdom of Aperture has prepared every conceivable weapon to fight us.  Our only chance remains with the rogue Explorer magician, who has yet to be found.  If you see this magician, they are to be detained and brought back to Black Mesa.  Your King’s favor goes with you.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <span>“Shit.”  Gordon mutters and shakes Benrey awake.  The magician groans but wakes up quickly enough.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Gordon, is something-?”  Before he can finish his question, Benrey’s interrupted by Gordon pushing the proclamation into his face.  He takes it from Gordon and Gordon watches as his eyes trace over the lines of script.  “Oh.  This is… Not good.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Then we’re in agreement.  I don’t-  This may be why Queen Gladys sent soldiers after you, as well.  We just weren’t aware war was lingering on the horizon.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We had no way to be aware of that.  It’s not something you send heralds to announce in the streets, Gordon.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“True.  But… What do we do from here?  We don’t have the strength nor supplies to simply continue hiding in the forest.  Hell, the only reason you aren’t being taken to Black Mesa currently is a deal I made with a god!”  Gordon continues to wind himself tighter and tighter, like a clock spring, and he stands up to start pacing, but Benrey only quietly stares out at the lake, proclamation still held in one hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What if…”  Benrey interrupts Gordon’s anxious rambling by turning towards him.  “What if I were to turn myself in?”  Gordon crouches down in front of Benrey, who continues to look out at the water.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You don’t… We don’t have to involve ourselves in this war.  We could just… Run away.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“But that’s your home.  You take such pride in being a knight.”  Benrey finally turns to look at Gordon, and Gordon laces their fingers together, gently pulling the proclamation from Benrey’s hands.  He debates ripping it to pieces, but instead stuffs it into one of the pouches around his waist before taking Benrey’s hands once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>You </span>
  </em>
  <span>are my home.  Not those cold stone walls and empty halls.  I don’t need some king’s approval when I have your love.”  Benrey’s face becomes red at Gordon’s words and he leans forward, hiding his face in Gordon’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I never would’ve let you kiss me if I knew you were going to try and kill me with your words.”  Gordon laughs and settles from a crouch to sit in the grass, Benrey leaning forward to stay on his shoulder.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Truly, Benrey, I will be by your side no matter what choice you make.  But the choice is yours.  What we do, where we go, I will let you decide.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Do you think your king would do me injury?”  Benrey asks and Gordon is quick to shake his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“If he even attempted to harm you, I would kill him and take you far from there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I trust you.”  Benrey finally lifts his head from Gordon’s shoulder, their eyes meeting.  “Then my choice is made.  We go to Black Mesa.  From there… We shall see.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That sounds agreeable enough.”  Gordon pulls both of them up from the ground.  “Then we need to get ready to leave.  War waits for no one.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Unfortunately.”  Benrey starts to put out the fire while Gordon stores the bedrolls away.  This morning feels like almost any other on their journey, except for the fact that one of them will occasionally interrupt the other’s task for a kiss, quick and already beginning to bloom with a sense of familiarity.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Soon enough, their camp is packed up, and both men leap onto the back of one of the knights’ horses.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Are you frightened?”  Gordon asks Benrey one last time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Not as long as I’ve got you with me.”  Says Benrey, and Gordon ignores how his face heats up at that, instead spurring the horse onwards, riding towards Black Mesa with all the speed available to him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The air around them seems to grow almost heavier the closer they ride to Black Mesa, and it takes much longer than Gordon thinks it should’ve for him to recognize the heaviness as a scent, the smell of blood thick and sickening.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Why does…?”  Benrey quietly asks, trailing off without finishing the question.  The only answer Gordon can think of is that the two of them are too late, and war has dawned with the rising sun.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Indeed, this seems to be the answer when they ride up to the front gate.  Bodies are strewn about the closed gate, face down in the mud with arrows sprouting from their backs and army uniforms obscured by thick black cloaks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Stay on the horse.”  Gordon murmurs and Benrey nods, sliding forward to grab the reins as Gordon slips down, landing in the mud.  He creeps forward, and uses the blade of his sword to shift aside the fabric. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Nausea churns in Gordon’s stomach as he realizes these are Black Mesa soldiers, dead at the gate of their own kingdom.  Dreading the answers to his questions, Gordon investigates each of the corpses.  All of them are Black Mesa soldiers, though thankfully he doesn’t recognize any of them.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The fact none of the corpses belong to Aperture is… Confusing.  As are the cloaks, which weren’t standard fare when Gordon left on his quest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Was it an ambush?”  Benrey asks, the horse carefully picking its way closer to Gordon, and all the knight can do is shrug.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That seems to be the most logical answer, but even if that were the case, you’d think they would’ve slain at least one of their attackers.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That does make sense.”  Gordon squares his shoulders and marches up to the gate, slamming on it three times with the pommel of his sword.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>At first, Gordon thinks there won’t be an answer forthcoming, but Benrey makes an alarmed noise in the back of his throat as he stares up at the ramparts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Who goes there?”  A voice yells down and Gordon steps back into the line of sight of whoever is up there.  “...Sir Freeman?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Josh!”  Gordon shields his eyes from the sun, and sure enough Josh aims down at them with a bow and arrow.  He’s quick to lower his weapon as soon as he recognizes his fellow knight.  “What happened here?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“It’s chaos inside, Sir!  I’ll come down and open the gates for you!”  Josh vanishes behind the ramparts and Gordon goes back to Benrey, leaping on the saddle while Benrey keeps the reins.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Soon enough, the gates creak open, Josh watching anxiously as Benrey and Gordon ride in before he shuts the gates once again.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What’s happened?”  Gordon asks and Josh waves them to the door that leads inside the walls, glancing around anxiously the entire time.  Once they’re safely within the walls, Josh takes a sword leaning against the wall and presses it into Benrey’s hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The inner city has descended into chaos, Sir Freeman!  Last night, the wall guard was told there were intruders at the gate, and so the archers shot them down.  This morning, the king’s heralds announce a plague has suddenly descended on the city.  No one is showing any signs of sickness but all the doctors and nobility have been taken to the castle, the entries sealed off behind them.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That’s incredibly suspicious.”  Benrey notes and Josh nods fervently in agreement.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Aye, that’s what the people think as well!  I’ve heard riots raging at the castle all day, and it seems several of the other knights have vanished into thin air!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Are you the only one stationed on this section of the walls?”  Gordon asks and Josh nods once again.  Benrey and Gordon share a look before Gordon takes a deep breath.  “Josh, the intruders all slain at the gates… They were all knights of Black Mesa.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“No.”  The blood flees Josh’s face and he leans back against the wall.  “No, we didn’t-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You did your job.”  Gordon lays his hands on Josh’s shoulders.  “You did what you were supposed to do.  I have a feeling something more is going on here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I think it has something to do with that proclamation you received this morning.”  At Josh’s confused look, Gordon pulls the proclamation free from the pouch he’d stuffed it into and hands it over to Josh.  The young knight quickly reads, and Gordon recognizes the moment he finishes, because Josh shakes his head and scans the proclamation once more before handing it back to Gordon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That makes… No sense.  Why would we go to war with Aperture?  Their ambassador just left two days ago.  King Wallace told us that relations with Aperture were better than ever.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Gordon.”  Benrey sounds anxious and Gordon goes to him, letting Benrey clutch at his upper arms.  “What if this was a trap?  For us?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“No, why would he-?”  Gordon starts to shake his head.  “I’m not sure how he would even know I had found you in the first place.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Perhaps the ambassador took the rumors of my arrival in Aperture here with them.”  Benrey mutters and Gordon pinches his lips.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We need to talk to Captain Valencia.”  Gordon turns back to Josh, who straightens up and nods, more focused now that he has something to focus on.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“It may be quicker to go along the top of the wall.  Keep your swords drawn, I worry some of the citizens may have found the doors leading up.”  Gordon and Benrey exchange one last nervous glance before they follow Josh up a flight of stairs and out into the hot sunlight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Josh turns to them like he’s about to say something when an explosion rings through the air behind the three of them.  Benrey jolts while Gordon turns to look, cautiously leaning out over the ramparts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Why are you two here?”  He calls in shock, causing Benrey and Josh to join him in looking down at the gate entrance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Is that any way to treat an old friend?”  Darnold calls up to him and Forzen cackles next to him.  Both of the Aperture citizens are on horses, Darnold’s pointed hat signifying his magic inclination and Forzen wielding a double-sided axe on his back.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I assume you know them.”  Josh says wryly and Benrey nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We met them in Aperture.  Darnold is a potions master and Forzen wishes to be a knight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Well, then, let’s let them in.”  They’re quick enough to raise the gates and Gordon embraces Darnold.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“It’s good to see you.  And ten years haven’t passed since we saw you this time!”  Darnold laughs at that.  “But be honest.  Why are you here?  And how did you get here so quickly?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We came to find the two of you.  I received a message, stuffed under my door not long after the two of you left in a hurry.”  Darnold pulls a roll of parchment from his satchel and hands it to Gordon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“This reunion is lovely, but we should get out of the open.”  Josh seems to be anxious again, and Forzen’s hand goes to the grip of his axe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Why?  Is there some kind of battle happening?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“‘Riot’ would be a more accurate descriptor.”  Forzen glances around and joins Josh in herding the group back within the walls.  “We should be safe in here… For now.”  Gordon nods and unrolls the parchment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <em>
    <span>‘The king aims to slay every last knight within his kingdom.  Then he will move on to his citizens, unable to protect themselves from his wrath.  You must inform someone within the knights of this plan, as their king can no longer be trusted.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <span>“Why would he…?”  Gordon murmurs and Josh snatches the parchment from Gordon’s lax grip, sharing it with Benrey as the two of them read.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I believe your king’s gone mad, Gordon.”  Darnold almost seems apologetic when he says that.  “There have been… Rumors, when I’ve spoken with magicians and alchemists hailing from Black Mesa.  The ones who worked for the King’s court told me that King Wallace believed himself capable of achieving godhood.  Indeed, with these events coming to light, he may intend to become a god of death or carnage or something equally horrible.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That can’t be allowed to happen.”  Gordon unsheathes his sword, nodding to Forzen as he frees his axe.  “First, we find Captain Valencia.  Then… We storm the castle.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That seems tantamount to a death wish.”  Darnold sighs but begins to pull glowing vials from his satchel, instead slipping them up the sleeves of his robes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Together, the group climbs back up to the top of the wall, setting off around the perimeter of the city until Josh stops them.  From here, the angry voices of the citizens below ring out like a caterwaul, and Gordon does his best to ignore it as Josh leads them back into the walls, pushing forwards until they finally arrive at the Captain’s quarters.  There, guarding the door with his own sword, is another familiar face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Jefferem!”  Josh calls out, and Jefferem turns to face them, startling at the large group he finds.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You seem to have amassed an army of your own there, Josh.”  He grins just before his gaze lands on Gordon.  His shocked expression would’ve made Gordon laugh under different, less dire circumstances.  “I thought you were on a quest!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We’ve returned home at the proclamation Black Mesa is going to war.”  Quickly, and often speaking over each other, the group fills Jefferem in.  Though he looks dazed when they finish, he seems to have gotten most of the information, the dazed look on his face being replaced by one of intensity.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The captain will want to be informed of all this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“No need.”  Valencia’s door opens and he steps out, decked out in a full suit of armor, helmet included.  “Your informants were speaking loudly enough for me to hear them through the door.  We’re going to gather the rest of the knights and then storm the castle, orders be damned.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What orders were you given?”  Gordon asks even as he follows after Valencia, who’s set off at a brisk pace.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We were told to remain within the barracks until a doctor was sent to ensure the plague had not infected us.  With this new information you’ve provided us, I believe the doctor that was supposed to come would actually be a killer.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“King Wallace truly has gone mad.”  Gordon murmurs and Captain Valencia nods, face grim.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“He did seem to deteriorate after you left for your quest.  I merely thought it was worry for one of his best knights, but now… Now I simply don’t know what to think.  Of any of this!”  Valencia swings his arms wide with frustration, nearly slicing Jefferem in the process.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Sir, please don’t kill me before we arrive at the castle.”  Jefferem requests in a monotone and Valencia smiles sheepishly even as he resheathes his sword.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“We’ll alert the other knights to the incoming assassin and see if any of them will accompany us to the castle.  The ones who stay behind will move up to the ramparts in case Aperture or another kingdom decide they do indeed want to go to war after all.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I doubt they would.”  Gordon mumbles and Valencia shrugs even as they keep running.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>They burst into the main barracks and draw the startled gazes of several knights, forming a line to where a wooden table’s been dragged into the middle of the room.  A knight sits on the table, a syringe in his arm, and a man in doctor’s robes injecting him with what is surely some kind of poison.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“That man is no doctor!”  Valencia cries and the knights, sans the one sitting on the table all leap out of line and go to draw their weapons.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I’ve been sent on the orders of the king!”  The doctor cries, even as he withdraws the syringe from the arm of his patient.  The knight on the table blinks as the medicine spreads through his system, before he reels backwards and collapses from the table onto the floor.  Once again, all gazes fix on the doctor, who stares at his patient.  “... He’s merely unconscious!  There have been proven side effects with this vaccine!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Apprehend that man!”  Valencia calls and even as the knights rush forward towards him, the doctor produces a scalpel from within the folds of his robes, throwing it so it lodges in the unarmed throat of one of his attackers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>While the remaining knights capture the doctor and search him to ensure he’s unarmed, Gordon goes to check the pulse of the unconscious man.  There’s a moment’s pause where Gordon can feel the weight of several pairs of eyes on his back, but he only sits back on his haunches with a bone-deep sigh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“He’s dead.  Poison, as we suspected.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Men, if that doctor has any more syringes on him, destroy them and the vile poison they contain.”  Valencia orders, while Josh and Jefferem cover the two corpses with bedsheets taken from volunteers.  “Alright, everyone!  Eyes on me!”  Valencia calls out as he climbs up onto the table a dead man had just fallen off of.  Nonetheless, all eyes obediently turn toward him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve been brought information that the king plans to destroy his kingdom, starting with the people who defend it!  And I don’t intend to let him follow through with this mad treachery.  This group with me will join me in storming the castle.  Now all I ask of you is to either join us or defend the kingdom while we cleanse the madness that lingers inside it.  Who will stand with us?”  As one, the knights lift their weapons into the air and roar their agreement.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Excellent.  Archers and long-distance fighters with Sir Josh.  He’ll lead the defense of the ramparts.  My close-quarters combatants, go to Sir Jefferem.  He’ll divide you into your squadrons.  Sir Gordon, his associates, and myself will lead the charge into the castle.  Prepare yourselves, for the rich pigs of the nobility will surely have brought their personal guardsmen into the castle with them.  You have half an hour to prepare.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>With that, Valencia leaps down from the table, and the barracks devolve into organized chaos.  Gordon turns when he feels an insistent tugging on his sleeve.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I want to talk.  Somewhere private.”  Benrey mutters and Gordon nods, leading the both of them into the hall outside.  He leans against the cool stone wall and watches as Benrey chews on his lip nervously, profile highlighted by the sun shining through the barred windows.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to join us in storming the castle.”  Gordon murmurs and Benrey looks at him, eyes wide.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m coming with you.  Someone has to keep you from getting killed by your own stupidity.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re so romantic.”  Gordon sighs with a roll of his eyes, and a little of Benrey’s nerves seem to drain away as he grins at Gordon.  “Then what did you call me out here to discuss?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Darnold’s potion… Back in his home in Aperture.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The one that didn’t restore your memories like it was supposed to?”  Gordon asks and Benrey grimaces.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s what I wanted to tell you.  It… It fulfilled its intended purpose.”  Gordon blinks as his brain struggles to process the information Gordon’s just revealed to him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So… Wait, so what does that mean?  That your memories were restored?”  Benrey says nothing, only nods silently, and Gordon grins, going to Benrey and resting his hands on Benrey’s hips.  “Well, that’s fantastic!  So what all do you remember?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I remember the reason a god was willing to make a deal with you.”  Benrey reaches up and cups Gordon’s face in his hands.  “I bet I even know the god who made that deal with you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How would you-?”  Gordon starts to ask, but Benrey interrupts him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I remember all of this because I’m also a god.  I’m not an Explorer, Gordon, I’m the one the Explorers follow.”  Tears spill down Benrey’s cheeks and he ducks his head, no longer able to meet Gordon’s eyes.  While his mind reels, Gordon’s body acts without conscious thought and pulls Benrey forward, letting Benrey hide his wet face in the crook of Gordon’s neck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why did you never… Say anything?”  Gordon asks, voice quiet, and Benrey hiccups.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I- I didn’t… I didn’t want to leave you.  I’d grown so happy, riding along roads in the day and camping at night.  You were so willing to help me, even after I tried to kill you.  Is it any wonder I fell in love with that?  Is it any wonder I hid who I was?”  Benrey pulls away from Gordon, letting Gordon’s hands fall limply off of him.  “I would’ve continued hiding who I was.  And I don’t think I would’ve regretted it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So why have you told me now?”  Gordon asks and Benrey’s lips pinch, even as tears continue to trickle down his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“While I am invulnerable, you are not.  This is one fact we’ve tested time and time again.  What if…”  Like it physically pains him to say, Benrey breathes in sharply before he resumes speaking.  “What if you died in there?  Believing you loved someone who was a liar?  I would rather you lived hating me, then died loving me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t hate you.”  Gordon blinks and Benrey finally meets his gaze at that, eyes snapping up to meet his before Benrey looks away once again, like he doesn’t quite believe him.  “Benrey… You’re not the god of Explorers to me.”  Slowly, Gordon walks towards Benrey and pulls Benrey’s hands away from where they’re wrapped around Benrey’s stomach.  “You’re simply the man I met on the side of the road, a man who seems obsessed with the idea I may be a criminal and who pulled an arrow out of my shoulder and was more worried for me than for yourself when you were taken.  You’re the man I love, Benrey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You swear it?”  Benrey locks gazes with Gordon now, a smile starting to show, and Gordon nods, even as he pulls Benrey closer to him.  “I love you, too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Additionally, now I can claim you’re stupid for thinking this revelation would make me hate you.”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Benrey opens his mouth, no doubt to berate Gordon and once again accuse him of being a criminal, Gordon tugs Benrey as closely as he can, resting his arms around Benrey’s neck and drawing him into a kiss.  Whatever angry tirade Benrey was about to go on is apparently lost to him, as instead he sighs into the kiss and presses Gordon back against the wall, hands reaching up to try and undo Gordon’s braid, only stopped by Gordon lifting one hand away from Benrey’s shoulders to bat Benrey’s hands away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The two of them stand there, trading whispers and loving insults, for what feels like hours.  Finally, an interruption comes in the form of Forzen, bursting out from the barracks.  All three of them freeze as they catch sight of each other, until Darnold pokes his head around Forzen, beaming at the sight of Benrey and Gordon clutching onto each other.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ah!  I knew I detected some traces of romance when you visited my home in Aperture.  I’m very pleased for the two of you, Gordon!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I thought they were already together when I joined them in their travels.”  Forzen mutters and Benrey cackles with laughter.  “Captain Valencia’s ready to storm the castle, Sir Freeman.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Forzen, we’re going into battle together.  I ask that you call me ‘Gordon’.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ll consider it.”  Forzen retorts and turns on his heel, heading for where the knights are milling about.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you ready?”  Gordon asks and Benrey nods, seizing ahold of Gordon’s hand and squeezing it gently as they join the crowd.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This was one of the longest chapters I wrote for this, I think, and it definitely shows.  I hope y'all like it!  Thank you for reading!</p><p>Come say hi on Tumblr @ holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>With the assistance of Gordon and the others, the knights of Black Mesa are ready to storm the castle.</p><p>No one knows what they're going to find there, other than a bunch of cowardly nobles.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>While the mob’s angry yelling may fill the air with the presence of thousands, Gordon estimates their actual numbers are much lower when he finally lays eyes on them.  They cluster around the gate to the castle courtyard, heaving pitchforks and torches and weapons into the air in time with a chant.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Heal the sick!  Do it quick!  Heal the sick!  Do it quick!”  The crowd chants and Gordon catches Benrey’s gaze just in time for Benrey to arch an eyebrow at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“At least they’re poetic in their protests.”  Benrey tells him and Gordon snorts, Valencia chuckling on Gordon’s other side.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How are we handling this, Captain?”  Gordon asks and Valencia looks out at the crowd, who haven’t noticed them yet.  “I suppose my only option is to shout and hope my singular voice is louder than their collective voice.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Darnold, have you any potions that can cause a loud noise without causing any harm?”  He turns to the potions master, who nods and pulls an orange vial from within the sleeves of his robes.  He twirls it around and Gordon almost thinks he can hear the liquid ringing in its vial.  “Will that work for you, Captain?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gordon, now more than ever I am grateful for every connection you have.”  Valencia rolls his hand in a ‘go ahead’ motion and Darnold lobs the vial up into the air.  It arcs over their heads and lands just behind the assembled mob.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As soon as the glass shatters, and the liquid within is exposed to the air, a sound like a rockslide begins to fill the air, growing in volume until it’s all anyone can hear.  The mob turns to look for the source of the noise.  Gordon grits his teeth as the sound borders on the edge of being painful, but then it abruptly cuts off, and Valencia steps forward to speak.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“People of Black Mesa!  We have grievances with the King and aim to infiltrate the castle!  He has conspired to have us murdered with fake vaccines, but his plot has been discovered and foiled.  All I ask is that you allow us access to the castle gates so we may break them down and remove the killer from the throne he sits on!”  The crowd roars with approval and people hurry out of the knights’ way as they march forward until they come to the gates, two large wooden doors closed before them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>If enough people bash themselves against a door without simply giving up and walking away, soon enough the door will begin to give.  And that is exactly what happens, the doors splintering and creaking until holes can be hacked into them with axes, allowing the knights entry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The courtyard is empty, flower beds untended and showing the first signs of weed growth, but the knights continue up to the door, soon enough chopping that down as well.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Within, they finally meet their first confrontation in the form of private mercenaries, likely hired by one of the nobles sequestered somewhere in the castle.  The mercenaries obviously aren’t expecting to face a very unhappy army, and are quickly defeated.  Valencia turns to face the crowd.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Everyone into your squadrons with your lieutenants!  Divide and conquer, men!  Inform any citizens or servants as to what is happening, and only kill someone if they attack first.  Leave the king alive.  Am I understood?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sir, yes, sir!”  The chant returns and soldiers begin to filter through the castle, leaving Valencia alone with Gordon, Benrey, Darnold, and Forzen.  “The four of you are staying with me.  We’re going to focus on finding the king.  Same rules as I gave to the others.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aye, Captain.”  Gordon nods and the others copy him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good.  Then let’s get a move on.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>King Wallace’s castle is large and extravagant, making it difficult to search.  Gordon isn’t sure how long they’ve spent searching, but they just passed a tapestry that he’s fairly certain he’s seen at least twice before.  Whether it’s the same, or a copy put there to confuse attackers, he can’t say.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you think King Wallace knew of your… Secret?”  He asks Benrey as they continue trekking through the castle, following wherever Valencia leads, and Benrey shrugs cluelessly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If he did, I highly doubt he would’ve sent one of his best knights to capture me.  If I’d kept my memories, I might’ve lashed out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“To be fair, you did that even without your memories.”  Gordon laughs and Benrey smiles sheepishly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, but that was… Definitely not the full extent of my powers.  If I’d been at my usual power, I could’ve easily killed you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, then I’m partially glad you didn’t have your powers.”  Gordon laughs and Benrey pulls him a little closer, the two of them stopping as they kiss.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m glad too.”  Benrey grins and the two of them lace their hands together as they hurry to catch up with the rest of the group.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright.”  Valencia sighs as they come back to the main foyer, where several, if not all, of the other groups are lounging around.  “Lieutenants, report!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“First floor and basement searched, sir.”  Jefferem drones and the other lieutenants list off various parts of the castle they searched until it sounds like they’ve searched every wing of the castle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Did we find the king?”  Valencia asks, glancing between the lieutenants, and all of them reply in the negative.  “Damn… Where could he have gone?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There may be a secret room somewhere.”  Benrey suggests and Valencia nods slowly as he continues to think.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, that may be.  Well, we’ll simply have to search the castle again.  This time-” he calls out as the knights regroup into their squads, “-Investigate any room that seems smaller than it should.  Look for levers, buttons, anything.  But do not activate anything.  Instead, send your lieutenant to fetch me.  I do not want any of you risking yourselves unnecessarily, as I’m sure the king will be well-guarded.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The knights nod and head off and Benrey smacks at Gordon’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You hear that?  The bit about no unnecessary risks?”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is this about the arrow again?”  Gordon sighs and Darnold and Valencia both become visually interested.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What arrow?”  Valencia asks as their group sets off once again, and Benrey’s grin grows vaguely sinister.  Gordon contemplates finding a stained glass window to leap out of.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We were attacked in a village while traveling and Gordon took an arrow to the shoulder.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh my goodness.”  Darnold blinks in shock.  “My, Gordon, that reminds me of how you and I first met.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do tell.”  Benrey encourages while Gordon shakes his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, no, there’s no need, Benrey has enough blackmail material as is-!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, earlier that day, Gordon had decided to fight a mercenary crew and had been rather badly beaten.  There were also a few stab wounds, if my memory serves.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How is that an unnecessary risk?”  Forzen asks and Darnold spreads his hands in bewilderment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, a group of bounty hunters were about to take the mercenaries in but Gordon decided that instead of letting them do their job, he wanted to fight a group of four all on his own.  I had to practically bring him back from the brink of death!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Did you now.”  Benrey says and Gordon ignores the feeling of Benrey’s gaze, cold on his skin.  “Gordon?  Why did you fight four mercenaries on your own?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...They insulted my mother.”  Gordon mumbles and Benrey blinks, the coldness in his gaze replaced by a distinct confusion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait… But I thought you have no family?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He doesn’t.”  Valencia confirms, a grin starting to spread on his face as he turns to look at Gordon over his shoulder.  “Gordon apparently leapt into a fight over the honor of a woman he’s never known.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He was a very aggressive man in his youth.”  Darnold nods sagely just as the group enters the dungeons.  Gordon’s breath fogs into the air in front of him, and Darnold rubs an orange salve on his hands.  It sinks into his skin quick enough and Darnold sighs comfortably.  “Would anyone else like some warming gel?”  He offers and both Forzen and Gordon take him up on his offer while Valencia simply dons a pair of thick gloves he’s pulled from his pouch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon tilts his head at Benrey, silently asking if Benrey’s cold, and Benrey winks back at Gordon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The cold technically falls under my domain.  Unexplored spaces tend to be cold.”  Benrey whispers and Gordon nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Spread out.”  Valencia tells them.  “Remember, don’t activate anything without alerting me first.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I suppose I could simply start exploding random sections of the wall…”  Darnold muses but Valencia is quick to veto that particular idea.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We want to leave the castle intact.  I’m not sure who will take the crown once King Wallace is dethroned but… Surely someone will.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mayhaps it will even be you who ascends the throne.”  Gordon suggests as he begins to run his hands over the stone bricks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why would I?”  Valencia asks and Gordon makes a disbelieving expression, even if he isn’t currently looking at Valencia.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re the highest ranking military official in the city, and you stayed with your men when the nobles hid within the castle.  It makes sense, logically, for you to take the crown.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nonsense.”  Gordon prepares to start an argument, shoulders rising, when Valencia suddenly speaks once again.  “Wait… Wait, I think I’ve found it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Truly?”  Forzen asks and everyone gathers around Valencia.  The captain nods and presses one of the bricks in.  It sinks deeper and deeper into the wall until it drops suddenly, thudding to unseen ground with a hollow sound.  Valencia pushes his arm through and gropes around until he makes another quiet sound.  He does something Gordon can’t see and quickly pulls his arm free from the wall.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dust gently snows down from the ceiling of the dungeon as the ground rumbles, and the wall pushes in like a swinging door.  The group meet each other’s eyes and they all are quick to draw their weapons, Darnold rolling a glass orb full of inky blue powder into his hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The hall behind the hidden door is visually remarkably similar to any other hall in the castle, a carpet of red fabric beginning past where the door swings and trailing off further.  Valencia stares in for a moment, but startles back when the door swings back closed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We need to gather the others.  I’ll stay to guard the door with Gordon and Benrey.  Darnold, Forzen, go to find the other lieutenants and summon them here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright.”  Darnold nods and he and Forzen hurry from the room.  As soon as the sound of their footsteps fades, Valencia presses his back to the wall opposite the hidden door and slides down it with a bone-deep sigh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I find I cannot stop wondering what drove our king to this.”  He murmurs finally, and Gordon and Benrey join Valencia on the ground.  “What made him so desperately desire to become a god that he would bathe himself so thoroughly in blood?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He is rather advanced in age.  Mayhaps he fears death as it draws closer to him.”  Gordon suggests softly and Valencia’s face twists with bitter distaste.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What excuse is that but one of cowards and crazed old fools?  Death will come no matter what we do.  While we may fight it, it is nothing more than a spar in the sunlight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And that statement there is precisely why I believe you should take the throne.”  Gordon grins, even as Valencia sighs with exasperation.  “You acknowledge the inevitable.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I will not lie, I think I would be tempted to repeat the process if our king has truly found a way to ascend to godhood.  How good of a man does that truly make me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It makes you human.  Only a man who has already lost everything would want to leave this realm.  Wanting something fantastic doesn’t make you a villain.  Killing to get it, however, is a rather different matter.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before Valencia can say anything else, rumbling footsteps start to approach.  Slowly, the lieutenants filter into the dungeons while the larger squads wait just outside the door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Over here.”  Valencia stands, dusting himself off, and Gordon and Benrey both follow his lead.  Once the lieutenants have come into the cell they all stand in, Valencia once again triggers the secret entrance.  Gasps of surprise can faintly be heard over the rumbling stone, followed by the waterfall hiss of almost a hundred weapons being drawn simultaneously.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We haven’t gone in, so we have no idea the dimensions of the interior.”  Valencia murmurs to the lieutenants.  “We’re going to enter one squadron at a time.  Stay quiet, but stay alert.  I’ll lead the first group in, clear?”  The lieutenants nod and split off just as Darnold and Forzen rejoin the group.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The main hall might be a little singed.”  Darnold smiles apologetically.  “It’s easier to get everyone’s attention with a small explosion than to hunt each squadron down individually.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“At least nothing caught fire.”  Forzen brushes what might be soot off his tunic.  “Nearly.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I already apologized to </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”  Darnold grouses but Valencia cuts them off with a wave of his hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m unsure what we’re going to find in here.  If it’s something… Horrific, I’ll do my best to get us all out of there as swiftly as possible and keep anyone else from seeing it.  But I am warning you to be prepared.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aye, sir.”  Gordon murmurs and Valencia turns, facing the door and taking a bracing breath.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, then.  We’d best get this over with.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Come say hi on Tumblr @ holdyourbreathfornow!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The knights begin to explore the hidden rooms within the dungeon.</p><p>They find rooms upon rooms of books, and a terrarium.  Someone's waiting for them in the terrarium.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>The hall in the secret area of the castle seems to be endless, but entirely straight.  Slowly, the soldiers work their way down the hall, stopping to investigate every door they come across.  While they haven’t found whatever horrific scene Valencia seems to be expecting, the scenes set up in the rooms are puzzling enough on their own.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Most of the rooms contain stacks upon stacks of books, some of them old enough to be carved in hardened clay, and the majority of them in languages Gordon can’t decipher.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Benrey, however, can apparently read everything they come across, but what he reads seems to be just as puzzling as the rooms around them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“They’re all religious texts.  Every book I’ve read here, every scroll, every tablet.  They all tell different stories for different pantheons.”  He tells the others, flipping rapid-fire through yet another book.  “This one has all the myths the Warriors believe in, all centered around the god of strength.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Why would King Wallace be so interested in the stories of gods he may not even worship?”  Forzen asks, but Valencia, disquieted, crosses his arms over his chest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Perhaps he was trying to discern how the gods became gods in the first place.  This would still fit in with his objective to become a god himself.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I’ve never heard any creation stories for any of the gods.”  Gordon murmurs and Benrey nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“It’s each religion’s most well-guarded secret.  Mortals tend to believe that if an enemy knew how their god was created, they may twist it into the method of their god’s destruction.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Is that even possible?”  Gordon asks, laying a hand on Benrey’s shoulder, and Benrey shakes his head, leaning into the touch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“No.  The gods are immortal and invulnerable.  They can be slain, yes, but they regather their power and regenerate, like a weed whose roots are left intact when you pull it from the soil.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I’ve never heard of a story where that happens.”  Valencia arches an eyebrow at Benrey, who clears his throat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Well, mayhaps you weren’t listening when you were supposed to be.”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I’m not going to dignify that with a response.  Let’s move onto the next room before I decide on whether or not I should feel insulted.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Though it may feel like an eternity, in actuality it hasn’t taken the group long to finally reach the end of the hall, where they find two doors made of some kind of black marble, inlaid with veins of pure silver.  Benrey shivers oddly the closer they become to the door, and Gordon looks at him questioningly.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“The energy coming from through those doors…”  Benrey murmurs, quietly enough that only Gordon can hear.  “It feels dangerous.  It feels like someone took one of my Explorers’ magic and… Inverted it, somehow.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Captain!”  Gordon hisses just as Valencia goes to open the door.  Valencia freezes, his hand hovering above the door knob, and looks back at Gordon over his shoulder.  “Benrey feels dark energy coming through those doors.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Right.”  Valencia nods and readjusts his grip on his sword.  “Alright, everyone, arm yourselves.  King Wallace has to be through here, but I know not what else may also be in there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>Another short shuffle follows and Gordon grips Benrey’s hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Stay close to me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“And you to me.”  Benrey shivers again and Gordon presses ever closer to him.  “I’m alright.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I know.”  Gordon tells him and turns to watch Valencia open the door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The room beyond the black marble doors seems to be some kind of terrarium, filled with trees and plants.  The walls reach up, impossibly tall in Gordon’s mind, to show the ceiling is a glass dome, the moon shining through as it slowly climbs towards its apex.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>A path made of the same black marble cuts through the foliage, and Valencia leads the way down the winding path, weapon still held at the ready.  The plants seem to reach towards Benrey, and he looks around, eyebrows furrowed, even as one hand clings to the sleeve of Gordon’s tunic.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“This is… I recognize these plants.”  Benrey mutters.  “They all grow in caves, no light necessary.  In fact, the sunlight should have killed them long ago.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“And yet it hasn’t.”  Another voice rings out just as the group emerges from the foliage.  The room continues ever onwards, but now it’s a flat courtyard, symbols etched on the marble in chalk, and finally ending in a throne made of white marble, two white doors on either side of it, and King Wallace sitting on the throne proper.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The king looks just as he did when Gordon met with him those many days ago.  But where before the king had been clothed in a tunic of blood red and brown breeches, now he wears an outfit as black as the marble under Gordon’s feet.  Silver stitching holds together his tunic and trousers, and moonstones fashion his black cape to his shoulders.  He wears no crown, as it is instead placed at his feet like someone else laid it there.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Your Majesty.”  Valencia mutters, venom dripping from his words, and King Wallace smiles warmly from where his head is propped on his hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Captain Valencia.  I see you and your men survived.  How disappointing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Then you really did wish for us to be killed.”  Valencia sighs, but the resignation in his voice is swiftly drowned out by his anger once again.  “We have come to dethrone you.  Any king who would slay both his defenders and those he must defend is no longer fit to be king.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Quite right.”  Wallace still has that easy-going smile on his face, but as he continues speaking, Gordon can see something distinctly… Manic in it.  “But as you can see, I no longer intend to be king.”  Wallace nods at where his crown lays at his feet.  “No, Captain.  I will ascend even higher.  I plan to ascend to the realm… Of </span>
  <em>
    <span>godhood</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Yes, sire, I’m aware.  We aren’t going to allow that to happen.  If you were to become a god, then I would sincerely fear for all of mankind.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“And what, exactly, is that supposed to mean?”  In an outburst of energy, Wallace stands from his throne, cloak flaring out around his ankles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Let me make myself clearer!”  Valencia’s voice reverberates through the room with more authority than even the former king Wallace is capable of.  “You would bathe yourself in the blood of your people, and that bloodlust would follow you to the celestial realm!  You would drown the world in blood, and only bodies would be left to worship you!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“No, Captain.  I believe you’re mistaken.  If the gods are pure, then surely I will become pure once I ascend.  But…”  Here, Wallace’s eyes dart about the horde of soldiers, assembled behind Valencia.  “I can see you’ve a vested interest in ensuring that that does not come to pass.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You could surrender peacefully.”  Valencia mutters.  “Your Majesty… Wallace.  I don’t want to fight you.  I’ve served this kingdom and you all my life.  Do not turn my service into a disgrace.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“You think you can buy my surrender with outcries for empathy?”  Wallace barks a laugh and produces something from his sleeve with a flourish.  On closer inspection, it seems to be some kind of bundle of herbs, and everyone who has cloaks covers their mouths in case of poison.  Wallace seems unafraid of breathing in the smoke, as he lights the bundle and holds it over his head.  A beat of silence fills the room, but then the two white marble doors on either side of Wallace’s throne shudder violently as something pounds up against them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What the hell…?”  Gordon murmurs.  “I thought those were merely decorative.  The dimensions of this room are simply… Impossible.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“I doubt your king is one who would allow close inspection of his castle.”  Benrey replies, even as more blows to the doors are delivered.  “I’m much more concerned about what is actually hidden behind those doors.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Some kind of monstrous beings, no doubt.”  Forzen points to one of the doors.  “Look, whatever’s pounding away is chipping at the marble itself.”  Sure enough, when Gordon follows Forzen’s finger, there are spidery cracks visible in the marble, and they grow in number and size with every blow following.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Come to me!”  Wallace calls out.  “Heed and obey the words of your king!”  That seems to be the final straw, as the doors shudder one last time and slowly fall forward like two giant dominoes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>People shamble in through the doors, but Benrey inhales sharply with horror, and Gordon thinks he hears someone gag behind him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What kind of… Evil magic is this?”  Darnold whispers, and Gordon’s inclined to agree with him.  The people still shuffling slowly towards them have ashen skin, and several of them have visible wounds that surely killed them, with blood still pouring from them and leaving bright red streaks across the black floor.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“Don’t let those things touch you!”  Benrey yells out and a soldier ducks around one of the walking corpses.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“What is this?”  Valencia asks, looking around before leveling his gaze at Wallace once again.  “What necromantic horrors have you wrought in this castle, Wallace?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>“These are merely the loyal citizens of Black Mesa, given new purpose!”  Wallace spreads his arms wide and looks at the corpses with an expression eerily close to fatherly pride.  “They serve their king, even in death.  If you still truly want to serve me as you so emotionally claimed, Captain, join their ranks.”  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>One of the corpses lunges at Valencia, and he severs its head with his blade.  The body collides into him as the head falls to the marble floor, but he shoves it off easily enough and kicks away another corpse that had begun approaching him from the side.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If they kill any of us…”  Benrey mutters as he and Gordon press themselves back to back, “-Then I fear our dead will only rise again, and have to be slain a second time.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, then we shouldn’t let ourselves be killed by them.”  Gordon retorts, lunging out to behead one of the creatures before returning to his previous spot.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nothing could purify you of these sins!”  Valencia yells at Wallace as Darnold produces a glass orb from within his robes, hoisting it into the air.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Forzen shatters it with his axe and the yellow mist that spills out crawls up the corpses’ legs, flowers and grass blooming in its wake.  The plants must grow straight through the undead’s musculature, for several of them collapse bonelessly to the floor, devoured by the plant life.  While that certainly helped narrow down the number, the hordes spilling from the doors seem endless.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How many corpses do you think the king has hidden in that room?”  Gordon asks Valencia, who merely shakes his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve no idea how old these corpses are, nor how long the king has been planning this.  Hell, it could be a family idea.  These could be all the corpses of everyone in the kingdom since the kingdom was established.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, that’s certainly more corpses than I want to deal with.”  Forzen mutters even as he cleaves through yet another corpse.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I might have an idea.”  Gordon turns to Darnold.  “Do you have another of the same potion you used to get our attention back at the wall?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course.”  Darnold nods and Gordon points up at the glass dome overhead.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If we could get it to explode above the dome, then Josh and the other archers might see it and come to our aid.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How would we get it through the glass?”  Darnold asks but Benrey waves a hand.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Leave that to me.  Gordon, I may need you to guard me for a moment.”  Gordon nods and Valencia joins him when he waves him over.  Both of them stand on either side of Benrey as he closes his eyes in concentration and spreads his hands out, palms down.  Gordon keeps an eye on him as he fights, but for a long moment nothing happens.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon almost doesn’t notice when the moon hits its zenith except for how everything… Shifts suddenly.  Under his feet, his shadow seems to ooze up, blacker than the marble, and roll away from Gordon.  Around him, shadows of other people and things do the same, all coalescing around Benrey’s feet.  When Benrey’s eyes open, it seems that his pupil has swelled until it’s all Gordon can see, the moonlight reflecting in a pool of black.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Benrey…?”  Forzen mumbles next to him, but the shadows shoot up in a circle around Benrey, climbing higher and higher like the trees in the terrarium behind them.  Soon, they reach the glass up over Gordon’s head, and punch cleanly through it like it was nothing more than a trick of the eye.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As shards rain down around them, the shadows retreat to their proper places and Gordon seizes Benrey’s elbow as the god staggers slightly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you alright?”  He asks and Benrey nods as he covers one of his eyes with a hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That was… I haven’t done magic in a while.  I think I was out of practice.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Even if you were,” Darnold interrupts, “that was still one of the most powerful acts of magic I’ve ever seen from an Explorer.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...Thank you.”  Benrey smiles, though Gordon can easily see the edge of guilt hidden in it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Launch the potion.”  Forzen advises and Darnold nods, focus snapping back into place.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Right.”  Not bothering to add any flourishes this time, Darnold produces a slingshot from somewhere and loads a vial into it, aiming straight up and letting the vial soar overhead.  Gordon hadn’t seen the cloud of dust that accompanied the explosion back on the ramparts, but now he watches as a cloud of dust turns the light of the moon a poisonous shade of bright green.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How long should it take the archers to get here?”  He asks, finally turning his gaze back to Valencia, who murmurs under his breath even as he continues to slay Wallace’s creatures.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No more than ten minutes, I believe.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Excellent.  Then for the next part of my plan, we need to try and force these things as close to the doors as we can get them.  If I recall, the archers have nets they can fire.  If they can shoot those, it may hold the creatures back long enough for us to get the doors back in place.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then let’s get to work.”  Forzen spins his axe, and Darnold grins almost evilly as he produces glass orbs in each hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Little by little, the mob is pushed back until the living stand on the same line as Wallace’s throne.  Though he may have called the horde down upon them, Wallace makes no moves to attack the living directly.  Instead, he keeps his hands folded calmly behind his back as he watches the battle rage on.  Indeed, none of the creatures seem to act aggressively towards Wallace, from the little Gordon observes as he fights for his life.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The doors behind the knights fly open and the archers file in.  Josh fights his way through the mob until he’s standing before Valencia.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We saw the signal, Captain.  What are these walking nightmares?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No time to explain.”  Valencia pants.  “Tell your men to fire nets over the doors.  We need to trap these walking corpses behind the doors, but the beasts knocked them down.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What will keep them from simply knocking the doors down yet again?”  Josh asks and Darnold waves at him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have some potions that will make a hardening cast.  I doubt the beasts will be able to break through it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I certainly hope you’re right.”  Josh mutters, but disappears back across the battlefield nonetheless.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think that was the first person to doubt the abilities of my potions.”  Darnold mumbles almost disbelievingly, and Forzen manages to stop fighting long enough to pat the potions master on the shoulder comfortingly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The archers make their way to the front of the living and Wallace cries out in anger as the archers fire at both of the open doorways.  While the undead are still pouring through the door, they’re held back by the nets long enough for two squadrons to lift each door back into its frame, Forzen breaking one of Darnold’s potions against the door while Darnold does the same to the other door.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A red slime spreads across the door and Darnold pulls Gordon back before any of the mystery substance can get onto his boots.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I assume you’d like to keep those.”  Darnold says wryly and Gordon laughs as the two of them turn back to finish off the creatures that hadn’t been trapped back in their rooms.  Wallace collapses into his throne, shock clear in every line of his face, and he stays there until the courtyard is able to fall still once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s done.”  Valencia sighs, exhausted from the extended fight, as he wipes sweat from his brow with the back of his gloved hand.  “Wallace, stop this now.  We defeated your undead citizens.  It’d be foolish of you to continue to struggle.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There is one thing I continue to fail to understand.”  Jefferem interjects from his position next to Valencia.  “If this is all you were planning… Then how exactly were you going to ascend to godhood?  This seems less the making of a god, and more the downfall of a king.”  Wallace doesn’t lift his gaze at that, but he sighs and drops his head even lower.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If you truly want to know, then… I suppose I have no choice but to tell you.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>We're approaching the end game, people!  Thank you so much for all the love this fic has gotten, and I hope y'all continue to enjoy!</p><p>Come say hi on Tumblr @holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Wallace lays out his plan, and how it was doomed from the beginning.</p><p>His plan isn't the only thing doomed, though.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“None of this was supposed to have to happen in the first place.”  Wallace murmurs as he stares at his own folded hands.  Benrey, standing next to Gordon, tenses up suddenly, and Gordon looks at him in confusion, but Benrey’s gaze is now riveted on the downcast Wallace.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My original plan was to summon a god.  When they arrived, I’d found a legendary blade said to be able to drain the life force from absolutely anything.”  Before anyone can even flinch, Wallace produces a knife from a holster around his waist, and lays it on the arm of his throne.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You planned to kill a god?”  Valencia asks incredulously and Gordon feels the blood drain from his face.  He reaches out without taking his eyes off Wallace, only to find Benrey’s already reaching out for him.  Their hands collide before gripping together tightly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, I even had to create a whole new branch of magic to do so.  Or rather, my researchers did.”  Wallace gestures to the chalk on the floor, and Gordon swallows at the way the blood from the battle hadn’t seemed to smear or cover the chalk whatsoever.  “With just a little bit of the god’s blood on my blade, I could’ve activated these sigils.  And then… Then I would’ve ascended.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But something went wrong.”  Darnold hazards a guess and Wallace nods in agreement.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“While it was never written in any of the materials my researchers had, I learned that day that gods could reject a summoning.  It nearly killed me, but I wonder what it did to the god.”  His gaze finally lifts and lands squarely on Benrey.  Gordon bares his teeth at Wallace almost animalistically as Benrey clutches at the sleeve of his tunic in barely contained anger.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Which… God did you try to summon?”  Forzen asks, gaze flickering back and forth between Wallace and Benrey.  He seems to be on the edge of an epiphany, though no one else is.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The god of the dark, of unexplored places.  The god standing in this very room.”  In one swift move, Wallace stands and throws the dagger.  Gordon feels as if the world slows around him, watching the blade fly towards Benrey.  Instead of allowing that to happen, Gordon steps in front of Benrey.  The knife sinks into his stomach.  He chokes, eyes wide with shock, and Benrey cries out behind him, gripping at Gordon’s shoulders desperately.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Did you think I wouldn’t notice?”  Wallace bellows, stalking down the steps of his throne and unsheathing a sword.  Valencia lunges forward to defend Gordon and Benrey, but Wallace disarms him almost hilariously quickly, planting a boot against Valencia’s chest and kicking him.  Valencia slides across the marble floor, head cracking against the wall and knocking him unconscious.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Darnold and Forzen both attack next, as Gordon sags to the ground, Benrey cradling Gordon in his arms.  Before Darnold can throw any potions, Wallace seizes one from Darnold’s hand and throws it down at Darnold and Forzen’s feet.  Blue smoke rises from the glass and the two collapse, whether dead or unconscious Gordon can’t tell.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I may have wasted that blade on Sir Freeman.”  Wallace throws another of Darnold’s potions behind Gordon and Benrey, and a wall of ice or glass grows up between them and the rest of the army.  “He always was a fool.  But I will have your blood, little god.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Go ahead.”  Benrey murmurs, bowing over Gordon even as Gordon’s eyes lock with Wallace’s, bright with desperation for the one he loves.  “You’ve already killed me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t… Please.”  Gordon gasps, blood trickling down into his beard.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, do you love him?”  Wallace coos mockingly and Benrey says nothing, but Gordon feels tears wet his wound, the salt stinging though he doesn’t point that out.  “Then join him in death, you shadow fiend.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Wallace starts to swing his sword, aiming for Benrey’s bared neck, but Gordon finds he still has some strength remaining.  He plants a hand against Benrey’s chest, sending Benrey sprawling onto his back as Gordon struggles to his feet.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The sword slows with Wallace’s shock, and Gordon stops it with the palm of his hand.  He doesn’t feel the blood well up in his palm, reaching forward with his other hand to seize the hilt of the sword and wrench it away from Wallace.  The would-be god killer staggers backward, but Gordon follows determinedly, driving the blade through Wallace’s heart with the last of his energy.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Both of them fall to the ground, Wallace landing on his back.  If Gordon could appreciate the irony, he’d laugh at the fact that Wallace has landed perfectly in his own sigil, blood finally washing away the chalk he would’ve doomed Benrey with.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon lands on his front, but he doesn’t stay that way for long.  Benrey runs to Gordon, pulling him into Benrey’s lap once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My brave knight…”  Benrey sobs freely now, the initial apathy of grief gone from his voice.  “You’ve doomed yourself.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“My… Apologies.”  Gordon murmurs and Benrey presses wet kisses all over his face.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Never apologize to me, Gordon.  You could… Could stab me and not need to apologize, just as long as you stay with me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Would that I could… Benrey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know.  I know, Gordon, it’s alright.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kiss me.”  Gordon sighs and Benrey obliges, pressing their lips together and cupping Gordon’s jaw oh so gently.  Gordon grabs at Benrey’s shoulders, but his vision is fading, along with his strength.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The last thing he feels is the press of Benrey’s lips to his, even as Gordon’s mouth goes slack with his last breath.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>...Whoopsie daisy!  Hopefully y'all still enjoyed this latest chapter!  A lot of y'all were making predictions about what would happen, but they weren't exactly... Accurate.  I still enjoyed reading them a whole lot and seeing y'all engage with this story!  Stay tuned for the last chapter!</p><p>Come say hi on Tumblr @ holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Gordon awakens in a forest grove, on a slab of stone.</p><p>He follows a path out, unsure where it will lead him.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
  <span>He doesn’t know where he is.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>While normally that realization would be a little more alarming, he feels… Asleep.  The kind of deep sleep where when he finally awakens, he knows he’ll carry around the memory of this sleep for the rest of the day.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>But for right now, he gets to keep this, continues sleeping, curled onto his side, one arm outstretched in front of him like someone had been sleeping on it only a moment ago.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>The more he notices about his body, the more he realizes he’s slowly returning to consciousness.  He takes his time, though, stretching leisurely and rolling over to hide his face in the crook of his elbow.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  
  <span>When Gordon finally truly wakes up, he doesn’t remember falling asleep, or falling asleep… In this place.  Gordon stands and turns in a slow circle.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He stands in the middle of a forest grotto, having been sleeping on what seems to be a slab of granite.  When he crouches to examine it further, Gordon finds carvings in the sides of the slab he had slept on.  It seems to be a phrase, repeated over and over, and Gordon feels a vague sense of melancholy when he traces the letters with his fingers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A small pool of water seizes Gordon’s attention next, but when he leans out over the edge, he almost startles back at his own unfamiliar reflection.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His hair falls nearly down to his waist, longer than when he’d last looked in a mirror, and free from its usual braid.  His glasses are perched on his nose as they should be, but the carefully twisted wire frames he’d had before are gone, replaced by some kind of translucent red crystal.  A scar he had gotten under his chin during a spar with… Someone years ago is gone, nothing left to show it had been there in the first place.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon’s clothes are unfamiliar as well.  His top leaves his midriff bare, the burgundy fabric soft against his chest.  See-through fabric is clasped at his shoulders, affixed to cloth bracers around his forearms and draping behind him, long enough it brushes against the ground in an imitation of a bridal train.  His pants are skin-tight and made of the same burgundy fabric, stopping just above the ankles of his bare feet.   </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon stands, still brushing his fingers along the underside of his jaw in bemused wonderment.  His memories still elude him, just beyond his reach, but Gordon wonders if he’s dead.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, that’s…”  Gordon murmurs out loud and turns away, the idea too overwhelming to consider any further.  Instead, he sets out from the grove, following a well-worn path that leads away into the forest.  As he walks, the air remains oddly still.  Underfoot, Gordon knows he must be stepping on plenty of sharp rocks and splintered twigs, but none of the pain registers, nor do the tiny obstacles snag on his cloak.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>If this truly is death, then Gordon is grateful he won’t have to spend any part of his afterlife bandaging his feet or mending his clothes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The path Gordon walks on eventually leaves the forest, instead leading through a small, unlatched door set in a towering stone wall, and into the marketplace of an unfamiliar town.  Though Gordon has no money, he peruses the wares regardless, stopping at the jewelry stall of a husband and wife who are bickering fiercely.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And furthermore, how am I to believe your gaze was not on that evil woman from the weekly meeting?  She certainly had her eyes set on you!”  The woman throws her hands into the air and Gordon’s eye catches on something glinting on her finger.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s a beautiful ring you have.”  He interrupts the bickering, and the couple turn to him, shock temporarily drowning out the rage.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...Oh!”  The woman twists her hand from side to side, the sunlight making the gold flash.  “Oh, isn’t it?  My husband, Lionel, is a merchant.  He uses most of his money to purchase a new ring for me every year on the anniversary of the day we were wed.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She always tries to convince me not to purchase her another one, but we donate the old ones to newlyweds regardless.”  Lionel smiles and Gordon finds it contagious.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How lovely.  How long have-?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Near on thirty years now.”  The woman smiles as well.  “Aye, we’ve certainly been through our fair share of events.  Like that disaster last year.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, if you’ve survived all that, then I’d be surprised if some woman from some meeting was able to destroy that.”  Gordon blinks, having said that without any conscious thought, and immediately plans to flee from the stall out of embarrassment, but instead the woman sighs and lays her hand on Lionel’s arm.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Lionel, I’m so sorry.  I’ve just… I feel old some days, my love.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Moira, I swore to love you until we were dust in the earth.”  Lionel covers Moira’s hand with his own.  “May the Sleeping Lover strike me down if I ever break that promise.”  Gordon smiles again at the romantic scene before him, but Moira startles and turns back to him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, dear, we really should save conversations like that for the privacy of our home.  I’m very sorry for that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t need to-”  Gordon starts to say, but the moment he opens his mouth, Moira thrusts a pair of thick golden ankle bracelets into his hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You may be content to walk around looking like a dancer, who am I to know, but these will certainly complete the look, love.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t have any money-”  Gordon tries to say yet again, but Lionel is the one to talk over him this time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nonsense, sir.  Consider it payment for services provided.”  He wraps an arm around his wife’s waist and smiles sweetly at her.  “We haven’t had an open conversation like that in… Quite a while now.  Let alone in front of a stranger.  Thank you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m glad to have been of service.”  Gordon mumbles, confusion most likely still clear in his voice.  He kneels down to fasten the bracelets around his ankles before wandering away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Everywhere he looks, couples are pressed close together, and children shriek as they play together.  Siblings bicker playfully, and old friends embrace like they haven’t laid eyes on each other in years.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gordon wonders why these sights don’t depress him, reminding him that he’s alone, but instead all he can do is smile, waving to everyone who waves at him and even playing ball with a group of older children.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When the children get tired of playing ball, they pull Gordon to a bed of wildflowers, the children starting to make daisy chains while Gordon lays on his back in the flower bed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hello.”  A soft voice murmurs and Gordon’s eyes open, squinting in the sun.  A man leans over him, a ring of hyacinths around his brow.  “My name is Rhapsodus.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And I’m Gordon.”  He sits up and Rhapsodus settles himself on the ground next to Gordon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I was told to meet the newly-awaken God.”  Rhapsody mumbles and waves a hand over the spots where the children around them have plucked flowers.  Gordon watches with awe as the flowers regrow, like they’d never been plucked in the first place.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you a God as well?”  Gordon asks and Rhapsodus blinks, before he smiles softly and shakes his head.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, Gordon.  I’m a flower spirit.  Spirits tend to gravitate around a God whose domain best fits there.  For flower spirits, you would be that God.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But what is my domain?”  Gordon asks.  “I’ve scarcely been reborn for a day.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think you already know.”  Gordon thinks as Rhapsodus wanders off, settling down again to show a little girl how to blow dandelion puffs.  The seeds spiral away from the stem and are whisked away by the wind.  Gordon watches two seeds twirl around in an odd little dance, and thinks back to Lionel and Moira.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Love.”  He mumbles to himself and the warm wind blowing past seems to pick up in strength for a brief moment before settling once again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You understand now?”  Rhapsodus calls from the ring of children, and Gordon nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So what do I do from here?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, you could journey to the seat of your domain.  Your home court so to speak.  You could also travel to the Main Pantheon, where the other Gods assemble.  I could send out a request for them to assemble there if they aren’t there already.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How would I get there?”  Gordon asks, and Rhapsodus thinks for a moment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I believe the southern winds would help.  They fall under your domain as well.  Simply whistle out and a wind spirit should appear.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After a brief but hesitant glance at Rhapsodus, Gordon does as the flower spirit suggests and whistles out a sharp note.  The wind that had previously been gently sweeping through spins in a wide circle, picking up in intensity.  The children run home, screaming with glee as the wind ruffles their hair and pulls flower petals from their crowns.  The circle the wind blows in grows tighter until Gordon has to shut his eyes for a moment.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he opens them back up, a woman stands before him, the flower petals taken by the wind braided into her stormcloud gray hair.  She blinks and shakes a loose strand of hair from her face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I was summoned?”  She asks and Rhapsodus nods.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hello, Strata.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Rhapsodus.”  With a grin, the wind spirit drops into a playful curtsy.  She turns back to Gordon.  “I’d no idea a new God had risen.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is Gordon, the God of Love.”  Rhapsody’ voice takes on an odd ringing quality, like windchimes, and Gordon bows his head, feeling oddly regal in the moment.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Strata.”  He smiles softly and Strata bounces on the heels of her feet, turning transparent as the wind picks up before she solidifies once more.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ooh, how exciting!  The pleasure is all mine!  Where did you need to go?”  She asks and Gordon hesitates, glancing back to Rhapsodus.  “Ah, I forgot.  Rhapsody, he’d need to go to the Main Pantheon, correct?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes.  He still needs to claim his seat there.”  Rhapsodus clasps a hand comfortingly to Gordon’s shoulder.  Gordon smiles in thanks, and Strata holds her hands out, palms up, nodding down at them until Gordon gets the idea and lays his hands on top of hers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hold tight.  Wind travel’s a bit disorienting.”  She warns cheerfully and suddenly everything outside of the two of them disappears in a swirl of dust and mist, the clouds funneling up and around them until even the sky over Gordon’s head is blotted out.  He watches vague shapes flicker on the other side of the clouds until the wind finally dies down and reveals his surroundings.  Strata giggles as Gordon takes in his surroundings with awe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The Main Pantheon seems to be an entire city nestled in the clouds, the fog low to the ground obscuring his feet from view.  Buildings sprawl along roads of marble walkways, fire flickering in braziers set atop poles along the roads.  The homes themselves differ in design, some taller than Gordon can see, made entirely of stained glass, and others low to the ground, nothing more than a roof on intricate pillars.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is… Lovely.”  Gordon murmurs and Strata gently pulls his hand into the crook of her elbow.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It is!  Spirits tend to either dwell here in their sectors, or near the seat of their god’s domain.  I can show you your sector?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Strata!”  An older man’s voice calls out suddenly and the wind spirit startles.  She turns, pulling Gordon with her, until the two of them see the man striding towards them.  Gordon assumes this man must be a fire spirit, as his hair flickers in silver flames.  Lower flames, burning a deep red, form a wreath on his brow.  “Strata, Rhapsody sent word you were bringing the new God?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I did!”  Strata nods and nudges Gordon forward until his hand falls away from her.  “Introducing Gordon, God of all love, Patron to the Southern Winds and the Spring Flowers.”  While Gordon notices the same ringing tone in her voice as was in Rhapsodus’, he’s more intrigued by the addition to his introduction.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What was that last bit?”  He asks, turning back to face her, and the fire spirit chuckles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just a title, Gordon.  Gods tend to collect them rather quickly.  I swear, my husband probably has more titles than centuries he’s been alive.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Your husband’s a God?”  Gordon asks and the fire spirit arches an eyebrow at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Boy, you may be the God of love, but that doesn’t give you permission to start meddling in my marriage.  He’s Lord Coomer, the God of courage.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t mean to meddle.”  Gordon apologizes, but the fire spirit waves him off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ah, you’re naught but a baby.  Am I to hold a grudge against a squalling infant?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is Bubby.”  Strata murmurs to Gordon.  “He tends to get rather… Heated.”  Gordon laughs and Bubby sighs with aggravation.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why don’t you go steal someone’s hat, you dust devil?  I’ll escort Gordon to the Pantheon.”  Strata winks at Gordon before vanishing from view, the only sign she was ever there in the first place are the flower petals she leaves littered on the floor.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So you’re not insulted?”  Gordon asks as he follows Bubby, and the elder fire spirit shakes his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course not.  I may look bright, but I rarely burn.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh good.”  Gordon sighs with relief and Bubby smirks at the God over his shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You must certainly be the God of something like love if I find myself befriending you so quickly.”  Gordon doesn’t know what to say to that, but he’s saved from carrying on the confusing conversation when Bubby suddenly stops.  “And here we are.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The Pantheon is a ring of pillars carved from what seems to be different precious stones, large sections of fabric acting as doors between each one.  Bubby leads Gordon through a screen of glittering gold, and Gordon feels it gliding over his head and down his back like rainwater.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Within the Pantheon, a large firepit burns merrily, fire spirits sitting within the flames while spirits of other kinds commune in other random spots, including atop the pillars.  A ring of thrones circle the firepit, each one of a different material and design.  Gordon looks at the thrones, and those sitting on them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As if by some magnetic force, Gordon’s eyes are drawn to a throne made of rippled rock, water trickling down the curves in the surface and pooling below where it instantly freezes into ice.  In the shadows of the throne, eyes with yellow sclera and slit pupils meet his own.  As soon as they see him, though, the pupils fill out like full moons and Gordon lifts his head to meet Benrey’s gaze.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The God blinks several times rapidly, like he can’t believe what he’s looking at.  Gordon finds himself walking forward without conscious thought and in the periphery of his vision, he sees Bubby join his brethren in the fire pit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re alive.”  Benrey whispers and Gordon smiles.  “You-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I love you.”  Gordon says, voice ringing clear in the suddenly still air of the Pantheon, and Benrey pushes himself from his throne, taking a running leap at Gordon and sending them both onto the floor, Gordon laughing as Benrey peppers little kisses all over his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I missed your laugh-”  Benrey whispers between kisses.  “Missed sleeping in your arms.  Your beard.  Spending all my days and nights with you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I missed you too.”  Gordon returns the hushed words.  Before he’d laid eyes on Benrey, he hadn’t noticed the open wound where his heart had been.  Now, he fills liquid starlight fill in all his missing parts, and he interrupts Benrey’s wild kisses to press their lips together, the two of them ignorant of the eyes on them, wrapped up in the presence of each other.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“When you two are… Done.”  A voice calls calmly, and Benrey finally pulls away from Gordon, haloed by the sun as he smiles down at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“To be continued.”  He mutters and Gordon laughs as Benrey stands and helps him to do the same.  The God that Gordon had met on a lake a lifetime ago smiles at Gordon and Benrey now.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“While I hate.  To interrupt a lovely scene.  Our newest God has… Yet to claim his throne.”  He lifts one long, bony finger, and Gordon looks to where he points.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A throne made of dark wood sits next to Benrey’s, where Gordon is certain there wasn’t a throne a moment ago.  Plush, dark red fabric forms the backrest and seat of the chair, and gold filigree decorates the wood.  Gordon ascends his throne and feels an energy fill him as he settles into it properly.  Between their two thrones, Benrey takes Gordon’s hand and Gordon smiles almost giddily as he laces their fingers together.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It is my honor…”  The man from the lake stands and clasps his hands together in front of him.  “To introduce Gordon, the Awakened Lover, God of Love, Patron of the Southern Winds and Spring Flowers.”  He settles back on his throne and Gordon nods politely at the applause that fills the air.  Benrey squeezes his hand and Gordon glances over.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Welcome to godhood.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think I’ll like it here.”  Gordon laughs and finally the Pantheon gets back to business.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>And we're done!  I just finished rewriting this entire last chapter, and I'm a lot more pleased with it, than with what you were originally going to get!</p><p>Thank you so much for all the love this fic has gotten, and I hope y'all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!  Thank you again!</p><p>Come say hi on Tumblr @holdyourbreathfornow</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading!  If you want to say hi, I'm on Tumblr @holdyourbreathfornow</p><p>This fic will update daily!  And thank you again for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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